Esther's Blog

Baby Shower: the Hope of New Life

2011-10-23T10:54:00.000-07:00

I went to a baby shower yesterday. After the devastation of Daniel's death, I felt very strange and teary-eyed during the brief drive to the event. When I walked in, it felt a little like the Twilight Zone. There were a lot of young women there, some pregnant, some with babies. Then there were a number of women my age, the mothers of the young women and their friends. Also a few younger girls in their early teens, cousins of the expectant mom. I looked around, wondering how many of this assembly had known, or would know, tragedy in their lives.

First order of business: find someone to talk with. I sat down with a woman I've seen before but didn't know. This was good for the initial break-the-ice casual chit-chat. It started to move my mind to neutral ground. Then the hostess asked us to go to the buffet and get our food. Food is always a life-affirming thing, and it was a lovely selection of down-to-earth healthy foods. As we ate and chatted, I became more comfortable with being in the present.

Then came the inevitable party games, bringing laughter to everyone's lips, and encouraging interaction with people outside of your own age group. I usually consider these games an inane waste of time, but in this case it was a useful step in the healing process for me. Passing a pacifier to a stranger by way of a soda-straw in your mouth makes everyone feel equally awkward and giggly. For a brief moment of concentration on a useless but difficult task, you must step away from all other thoughts.

The dad-to-be arrived, and settled down with his wife for the happy chore of opening the gifts. It was actually a ridiculous assortment of gifts. About 80% of the gifts were books: baby books and children's books. I guess I was one of the very few who bought what the couple registered for. But it was cute to watch all the young women react to the books.... they were still very close to their childhood selves, and the mere sight of these books brought delight to them. My peers and I simply smiled at "Good Night Moon" from the OTHER side of the memories. My friend, the grandma-to-be, sat contentedly holding someone's baby. She looked so very happy.

I kept looking around at all the women, glad for the wide spectrum of ages. I felt a little bit of cynicism, but also felt strangely comforted by the camaraderie of this age-old rite. It was good to see the excitement on the face of the mother-to-be, and feel the happiness of her friends as they expect the best for her. Life goes on, new babies are born, mothers laugh and cry. We were all there to help send her on this new journey with hope and support. And we'll all be there if life hands her a loss. As a community we share each other's joys and sorrows. That's comforting.

Yom Kippur Comes Full Circle

2011-10-08T23:18:00.000-07:00

13 years ago, we moved to Portland just in time for the High Holy Days. On Yom Kippur, we sat in a strange temple where we knew nobody, amidst a sea of people in white clothing, and navigated our way through the very long, intense, somber process that is Yom Kippur. Then, all of a sudden, a small boy burst through the door, having escaped from child-care, ran to the young couple sitting in front of us, beaming from ear to ear, and shouted "Mommy, Daddy, my loose tooth came out!"

That moment lives in my memory as my best Yom Kippur experience ever. It was so real, so NOW, so life-affirming, so joyous. Just the break we needed, and also a motivation to love God even more.

Fast-forward to 2011. Life has come full-circle in the mystical period of 13 years, to present us with... death. And my worst Yom Kippur ever. Friday morning, just before Yom Kippur began, we buried the 26-year-old friend of my sons. Then, a few hours later, the Holy Day began, and we attempted to switch gears, to focus on asking God's forgiveness for our alleged sins. I couldn't do it. I am sucker-punched at the sudden death of a lovely young man I knew so well. I am so angry at God, or whoever/whatever controls these things. My head felt like it would explode. (And later, during the night, I thought it might do just that.)

In the morning, we had all sat in Stampfer Chapel for the funeral, dressed in black. All the young men, including my two sons, sat in the back, huddled together for support. They all looked so handsome in their suits, and so bewildered at this new and incomprehensible experience. And sitting throughout the rest of the chapel were a lot of people my age, crying their eyes out. These were the parents of Daniel's peers. The mothers who drove countless carpools, fed him, made sure he took his pills with applesauce, and the fathers who coached the childhood sports teams and drove the Maccabi team to PDX at 4 am, the pre-school and Hebrew school teachers who set him on the road to a love of Judaism. We had all cared for him as one of our own, felt a certain protectiveness over this sweet, diminutive child. Some of us had continued to know him as an adult, and were so very proud of his accomplishments. We all protected him when he was in our care... what happened?!?

In the evening, many of us were back in the same chapel, dressed in white for Yom Kippur. I couldn't stop crying. I really have a bone to pick with God. How could You? I tried, really tried, to focus on the text in the book. Tried to think about my past year, or the year ahead. But all I could think of was Daniel, and that plain casket, and his parents.

And I thought about that little boy 13 years ago. I wonder what he's up to now. He must be about 18 or 19 now. How was his Bar Mitzvah? Is he going on Birthright? Or is he pierced and tattooed? Is he still alive? Is he healthy? Did his teeth come in okay? Are his parents alive? I hope so. And I wish I could tell them.... hold onto him tight.

Rosh Hashana in the Age of Facebook

2011-09-15T23:24:00.001-07:00

I don't know exactly how people traditionally prepared for Rosh Hashana. I've always felt it sort of jumped upon me, and I've never felt ready. But this year I find it's really being pushed to the front burner by, of all things, social networks!

Everywhere I turn, people are posting cool Rosh Hashana things on Facebook, or sending links by email... beautiful pictures, wonderful recipes, songs, videos, essays, prayers. It's actually got me thinking about the coming year. Ahead of time!

I find it fascinating how we utilize the newest technologies and trends to continue some of our most ancient traditions. It seems to help us relate to our ancestors, and explore what might be relevant today. Hmmm, maybe I'll download that Shofar app!

Mezuzah Finds a Good Home

2011-05-18T19:22:00.001-07:00

I had the pleasure of selling one of my mezuzot today. It was purchased as a gift for someone, which always makes me feel warm and fuzzy. And I know the person it's for, so it's extra special, knowing it will have a good home.

I won't post a picture yet, until after the recipient receives the gift. Then I'll come back & show it to you. Meantime, I just wanted to share my good feeling.

Post Script: Here's the mezuza...

Gold Platform Shoes

2011-03-20T17:59:00.001-07:00

Remember when I wrote about my inadequacies with makeup? Well, my relationship with women's shoes is kind of like that too.

Oh, to be sure, I wore heels most of my adult life, and it seemed fine. But gradually it destroyed certain joints in my feet, and 10 years ago I had surgeries to repair the damage. Since then I really haven't worn heels at all, and my feet just don't work that way anymore!

Don't ask me why, but when the lyrics in my solo for the Purim schpiel referred to "my platform shoes" I decided it was time to get a pair, and worse -- to wear them! That's when the comedy began. Have you ever seen a man trying to walk in women's shoes? That was me! You'd think I had never worn heels in my life. Hurky-jerky steps, sticking desperately to the carpeted areas, like a toddler again.

I practiced walking every day, and managed to get through our play without twisting my ankle. Of course, today my feet hurt, my legs hurt, my butt hurts, and my back hurts. But hey, they were GOLD PLATFORM SHOES! How could I resist?

And therein lies the mystery. These things are so ridiculous... perching your entire body's weight up on your poor little toes, with nothing but thin golden straps holding the shoes on. But no matter how rationally I know that, no matter how strongly the feminist in me resents them, I must admit.... a part of me still loves pretty shoes, sparkly shoes. Why? Sigh, there's a lot to be said for culturally ingrained aesthetics.

Update on Goings On

2011-03-20T17:41:00.000-07:00

Progress reports:

Art Spark was awesome! The folks from RACC said it was the best attendance they've ever had at one of these events. And we were so pleased to meet all these new people! Also, the Urban Farmer restaurant was SO very cool! I've never seen a restaurant like that, and it was extremely fun. Pictures soon.

Purim was wonderful! We worked really hard on our presentation, and it was worth it. With ten Disco song parodies spread out among the ten chapters of the Megillah, it was almost like a full-blown musical, and the audience was very receptive. Gershon and I both had solos, as well as a number of other choir members. Singing with a live band was so great, and I haven't seen so many platform shoes in decades!
Our friend Petra was kind enough to film some of it for us with my iPhone, so I'm in the process of uploading those videos to YouTube. The first one is up; you can see it at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AU948hA0JEE . Sorry about the mediocre quality, but hey, it's a phone!

The ORA exhibits continue in the lobby of MJCC, with my work among this week's featured artists. We set it up this morning, and it will be there until Friday at 2 pm. Next week will be the last exhibit in this series (and after that I'm gonna direct you to something really cool at Neveh Shalom).

Goings On

2011-03-16T19:47:00.000-07:00

I've got a lot going on right now. First of all... Art Spark!
I hope you will be able to join us tomorrow as ORA hosts this month's Art Spark gathering.

What is Art Spark? It's a program of the Regional Arts & Crafts Council (RACC) to promote art in Portland. It's described by RACC as "a bi-monthly mingling for artists of all sorts to meet, discuss, blather, applaud and plot the growth of art in Portland." Each meeting is hosted by a different group, at a different restaurant, club, or bar.

This is a big coup for our group, and I hope lots of our friends will turn out to support us and have a good time. Each of the ORA artists will have one or two works on display, and Eddy and I will each do a very brief address, around 6 pm. The rest of the time is for schmoozing, networking, drinking, and socializing.

There will be raffle prizes, and a no-host bar all evening. Admission is free.

Thursday, March 17th, 5-7 pm
Urban Farmer Restaurant
(8th floor of The Nines Hotel)
525 SW Morrison
Portland

http://www.portlandartspark.com/

Then, this Saturday night is Purim! My favorite holiday, of course, starring Queen Esther. Gershon and I are co-starring in Neveh Shalom's musical Purim Schpiel, "Shushan Night Fever."

Gershon plays King Ahasueros, and I have a KILLER solo as.... wait for it.... Queen Vashti!! You have got to come hear Gershon singing the Village People, and me belting out "I Will Survive." I even bought gold platform shoes for the occasion!

Service begins at 7:30 in Birnbach Hall at Neveh Shalom. If you signed up for the dinner beforehand, you'll be pleasantly intoxicated by the time the service begins, and you'll enjoy the Disco theme all the more! Do come in costume, or you will feel out-of-place. Prizes for the best costumes, based on.... I have no idea what!

But wait! There's more! ORA has a series of exhibits all month in the lobby of MJCC. Each exhibit lasts for 5 days, and my work will be in the next one. The exhibit starts this Sunday, March 20th, and will be up till Friday afternoon. Stop by and take a look!

I've been in a JAM

2011-02-24T12:19:00.000-08:00

I've been almost incommunicado lately, trying to finish the calendar web page for this year's Jewish Arts Month (JAM). Of course, the word "finish" is a fantasy, because this festival continues to evolve, right up to the end. So I'll continue to update the site, and add events, but the biggest chunk of my work is done. Phew! Maybe I can breathe again.

And now I have a moment to tell you about it... an amazing festival of arts - music, theatre, poetry, visual arts, films, photography, literature, and workshops. Special presentations by masters and amateurs, children and seniors, and everyone in between! Events are taking place all over Greater Portland, including some venues that might surprise you. It's so big, it couldn't begin to fit into a "month!" So it actually spreads over a period from February through early May. There's something for everyone, and for every calendar.

Wanna see what all the fuss is about? Check out the calendar page... and start participating!

http://www.northwestjewishartists.org/JAMcalendar2011.html

Remembering Debbie Friedman

2011-01-16T16:08:00.000-08:00

Volumes will be written about the accomplishments of Debbie Friedman, and people will sing her compositions in Synagogues for decades to come. But my strongest memories are from back-in-the-day, when we were in our early 20's, and she wasn't quite famous yet. That's how I will always remember her. And that's the memory that brings a smile to my lips, even as tears flow from my eyes.

Debbie came to Camp Swig in the summer of 1975, and turned the whole place on its head. We already had a strong song-leading program, heavily influenced with the "new" songs of Shlomo Carlebach and the Hassidic Song Festivals in Israel. And we were hearing some new songs coming from the camps in the East, and out of Cantorial schools. And then they brought Debbie in from Olin-Sang-Ruby.

How can I explain? It wasn't just the songs, although many of them were wonderful. It was the woman herself. She was so very energetic, intense, joyful, and determined. How could anyone resist being pulled in? She was clearly a rising star, and we knew we were in the midst of something important. And yet, she did not crush others, nor did she detract from the dance and art programs at Swig. The quietly feared friction between her and our own Debbie Pinto never materialized... they melded and soared together.

I will always picture her galloping around the dining hall, long hair flying behind her, and that beautiful Martin guitar that she held like a weapon of power. I remember her surprise at how cold it was when she first arrived at this Northern California camp... it was laughable, considering where she was from. I remember her glowing as she smiled at me one day over the heads of the campers, during an especially good song session. I remember her irreverent humor.

I never did know the politics behind it, but suddenly Debbie Friedman was a Camp Swig person, and suddenly we were making a camp album featuring her compositions. Here again, it could have been a Debbie Friedman album, but it wasn't. There were a number of songs featuring everyone at camp (see? I actually sang on her first album!), and some featuring various combinations of song leaders. It was a beautiful album, and it still holds up today. The cover was NOT a picture of Debbie, but rather the beautiful Migdal Mayim project that Peretz Prusan oversaw two years earlier.

Of course there are the songs. Everyone knows them, everyone loves them. But one line stands out in my mind above all: "Help us find the courage to make our lives a blessing." In the end, this idea exemplifies Debbie Friedman's life. After a truly life-threatening illness, it took enormous courage for her to resume her life's work. But she found reserves of courage, and indeed God did help her to make her life a blessing. A blessing in the world of Judaism, and a blessing to anyone who ever interacted with her.

Baruch Dayan Ha'emet.

(Thanks to Rick Heeger for the photo above. 1975 Songleaders depicted: Jason Gwasdov, Sharon Franz, Debbie Friedman, Debbie Pinto, Emily Georges, Neil Daniels)

Happy New Year

2010-12-31T20:12:00.000-08:00

I wish all my friends and family a very Happy New Year. May 2011 be a year of happiness, health, love, prosperity and accomplishment for all of us.

In other words, Shana Tova !!

Piece of Cake!

2010-12-24T23:39:00.000-08:00

There are lots of drawbacks to being Jewish. But one of the advantages (at least in theory) is that you don't have to deal with Christmas. Most years, we can totally avoid the craziness of the shopping malls for the few weeks before Christmas, and feel fairly smug.

Except me. I have 3 December birthdays to deal with: my twin sons on Dec. 20, and my husband on Dec. 24. Now, I could probably avoid the crunch of Christmas shoppers by planning way ahead, but it never seems to work out that way. And even if I do all my gift shopping online, it is inevitable that at least one cake must be picked up at Costco on one of those two days.

Today was the day. Yesterday I did my food shopping for Gershon's birthday/Shabbat party tonight, along with all the pre-christmas -grocery-shoppers. And today was pick-up-the-cake-at Costco-day. And some other stuff, as long as I was there.

Needless to say, parking was a bear. But once I conquered that realm, I approached the visit like an anthropology project. It was fascinating, and sometimes amusing. As I approached the entrance, people were coming out with carts full of cakes, pies, meat, and wine. And one guy carried nothing but a HUGE box of Ritz crackers. An older couple came out with only two items: a giant box of dishwasher soap and a giant box of bird food. (I guess one of those had reached an urgency level that justified battling Christmas-eve parking lots.) Then I went inside, and it was too funny. The jewelry roadshow was mobbed with lookers. Many shoppers were on their cell phones, conferring with someone about the exact variety of their shopping assignments. Others wandered the non-food aisles with glazed eyes, desperately looking for last-minute gifts. Then there were the generals: organized shoppers with a battle plan on paper. One young couple had 8 packages of Dove chocolates in their cart, plus a bottle of wine. Myself, I was going around in circles, trying to find where they re-located the salmon. (And then I almost went into cardiac arrest when I saw the price on the salmon!)

I got my 4 items, paid and got out alive. All-in-all it wasn't too painful, as long as I looked at the amusing side of the whole thing. We had a wonderful party, the salmon was divine, and MAN that cake was good! Even though I can't entirely avoid the holiday shopping throngs, I did manage to completely avoid the Mall all month, while still supporting the economy. I feel smug. At least a little.

I'm Not Making This Up

2010-12-12T00:25:00.000-08:00

What's your area of NON-expertise? Computers? Cooking? Home repairs?

Mine is make-up. I'm serious. I am usually a self-confident person, sure of what I'm doing in the kitchen, at the computer, at the sewing machine, at the wheel. But put a make-up brush in my hand, and I turn to mush. I look at this assortment of powders and gels that I've accumulated, and I'm sure that at one time I knew what to do with them, at least in theory. After all, the Mary Kay lady explained it. And then the Shaklee lady explained it. And then the SheerCover lady explained it. But now I'm unsure. I'm not used to this feeling, and I don't like it.

Solution? Don't wear make-up. 99% of the time I don't. But once in awhile, I really want to dress up and look like the other grown-up girls. Like tonight, for example. I was getting dressed up for the annual Holiday Party for Gary's company, and felt that I should at least TRY to look festive. So I put on my best beadwork (which I later took off and forgot to put back on), and some nice clothes. And then I decided it would really be nice to wear some make-up. I'm a little embarrassed that this is such a big decision for me, but it is.

So once I made the decision, I gathered up the various stuff, and tried to remember what to do with them, and in what order. After putting mascara on one eye, I realized that (a) I have a new, unopened one that would probably work better than this dessicated corpse, and (b) I should probably apply it after the eye shadow.

Eye shadow? Eeek? Um, let's see... my dress is aqua green, but I don't have any green eye shadow. Let's try this blue stuff.... yikes! It looks like someone beat me up! Okay, back to the old standard... light brown, very subtle looking. Yeah, stick with that. It's all coming back to me now; I go through this same sequence every time, and always end up with the light brown. I should just throw the others away.

Okay, back to the mascara. The lashes I started before look all clumpy with the new layer. I really should wipe it all off and start over. But I am NOT going back to the eye shadow, so this will have to do.

Concealer? Yes, I need to conceal everything on my whole face. But first I have to use that white stuff to cover up my red blotches before concealing. Sort of a pre-concealer. Except this white stuff is going on kind of shiny. Aren't we supposed to avoid shiny-ness? Maybe that's what the concealer is for. Sigh...

I briefly consider calling my Mommy on the phone. But she has no memory left, and she never wore anything but lipstick anyway.

Lipstick! Oh dear, how did I end up with 8 sticks of pinkish-brown? Even when that one female dentist advised me to avoid pink lipstick because of my pitiful yellow teeth. Gee, this is really a great exercise for building my self-esteem. No wonder I avoid it like the plague.

Okay, pinkish-brown it is. Apply generously, and then blot with a tissue. Blot a lot. Until it's basically all gone. Perfect. I feel like an idiot.

And then Gary comes home, looks at me and says "You look beautiful." And I melt. Maybe I should do this more than once a year! Or maybe not.

In-Home Private Sale!

2010-11-29T13:58:00.000-08:00

Did you miss our big Art Show last month? Or just need a few more gifts? Come visit our private, in-house Art & Gift show this weekend. It's just three artists, for two days.

Three artists:
- Esther's beadwork
- Eddy's fused glass
- Julie's fine metal & precious stone jewelry

Two days:
- Saturday, December 4 at Esther's house... 10 Del Prado St, Lake Oswego
- Sunday, December 5 at Eddy's house... 02 Canby St, Portland

Hours: 11 am - 5 pm both days

Come browse, enjoy, have a nosh and a hot drink.

You don't have to buy anything, but if you do, we will be accepting cash, checks, and credit cards.

Hope to see you!

Dear Abba...

2010-11-05T21:43:00.000-07:00

Dear Abba,

You might already know this, but a few years after you passed away, I met a woman who re-ignited my love for beads, and I started learning how to create art with them. Over the last 16 years, it has become a major focus of my life. I started by making earrings, then necklaces and bracelets, and inevitably entered the world of beaded objects. Before I knew it, I was creating picture frames, mezuzot, and even glass kippot! I often wished you were still here, because I knew you would love them.

Eventually, I found myself making beaded covers for Yizkor candles. I was enchanted with the idea, and loved the way the candle slowly burned down, illuminating more and more of the beadwork. And I always thought of you when I designed a new one, remembering that primitive plaster-of-paris Yizkor candle holder you made at Camp Swig. It was cast in a milk carton, and carving the letters brought you such delight.

And then one day, I was looking at someone's website, and she had these very simple blue-and-white stripes representing a tallis. Suddenly I got very still, and was overwhelmed with the memory of your passionate love for stripes, and for that exact symbolism. I knew I had to make a striped Yizkor candle cover, in your memory, and I knew I had to figure out how to include the first four words of the Kaddish. The mathematical planning took awhile, and designing the letters took even longer, but it was a highly charged mission, and it had to be perfect.

So here is a picture of the finished product, reflected in a mirror. I'm very proud of it, and it always reminds me of you and your passion. It has been in my sales display for a couple of years.

But the reason I'm writing this now, Abba, is that someone bought the "Yitgadal" candle cover from me at our recent art show. It's a bittersweet feeling for me, parting with it. At the same time, I'm so happy to have found a really wonderful home for this creation, where I know it will be loved and honored and used. The family who owns it never met you, but a little piece of your magnificent spirit now resides in their home.

Thank you for your continuing inspiration, Abba. I love you.

A Necklace For All Seasons

2010-11-01T01:04:00.000-07:00

My latest project started out as a simple idea... a Spiral Rope necklace with some crystals here and there. But then, of course, it got more complex. I was fascinated with Margie Deeb's take on the colors for Fall 2010... that necklace of hers with the graduated colors, blending gradually from Goldenrod to a deep red... I just had to do it. This, of course, necessitated a bead order from Bello Modo, and many false starts before i got the colors right. And forget the goldenrod, we ended up with peach.

Then I decided it should be a lariat, so what should I do at the ends? Eventually I decided that's where the crystals should go, since they didn't look good anywhere else that I tried. Okay, so far so good. But it seemed like the beautiful peach colors at the opposite end would hardly even be seen... what a waste! But wait! What if I make it reversible??? How in the world would I do that? To be honest, it was simply too late to make a similar lariat-style ending at the other end, since the beading was already done. Necessity mothered invention, and the peach-colored little "thingy" at that end was born.

So, my simple Spiral Rope became a reversible, graduating-color, crystal-laden lariat necklace.

In the fall and winter,                                                               In the spring and summer,
you can wear it like this:                                                           wear it like this:



In other words, what we have is a Necklace For All Seasons.

Evolution of an Art Exhibit

2010-10-31T01:19:00.000-07:00

Set-up begins Saturday night. I've done this dozens of times, but each time it's a little different. I'm trying a new display for my Yahrzeit candle covers... building a little shelf display for them. And where shall I put that lamp? No, it is NOT gonna stand on the Tupperware!

Other people's booths are just getting assembled. There is a palpable sense of excitement and hope in the air.

Sunday morning... getting closer. General layout of table is done, and now comes placement of individual items. This year I made a conscious decision to put out a little less, in the hope that shoppers wouldn't be overwhelmed. I was nervous about it, but it worked out quite well.

This table holds mostly necklaces on very visible upright displays. The plan is for this to catch people's eye as they come from the doorway. Then they can work their way around to the other table, with more affordable bracelets and earrings.

Gotta remember to take those clips out of my hair....

Other booths behind me look awesome! This is gonna be fab!

Almost done. Necklace table is ready; I think it looks pretty good. Um, except for my self-printed, sadly amateur sign. If I have good sales today, maybe I'll splurge on a professional sign.

Ready to roll! The beaded lamp worked out beautifully with the Yahrzeit candles.. symbiotic... a stroke of genius on Gershon's part. Got my good clothes on, and a necklace I made with a piece of Eddy's glasswork.

One of our members bought something from me before the doors opened... what a nice good-luck charm that was for me!

Leslie's booth looks a little funky behind me, but she changed it so that it worked very well.

10 am... another show begins!

Getting Ready

2010-10-22T00:55:00.000-07:00

After 11 years of selling my beadwork in art shows and craft fairs, you'd think I'd have the preparation down to a science. And I sort of do. But I'm still frantic in that week before the show, always feeling like I'm not ready, and won't possibly be ready. I never have all the pieces that I hoped to have done. And yet, the show goes on. So, why can't I just relax and go through the process without the stress? I don't know - maybe it's my own form of stage fright. Wish me luck on Sunday!

A Moving Experience

2010-10-04T11:07:00.000-07:00

When we were young, Gary and I moved a lot. For various reasons, we moved into a new apartment every year or two, and our parents & siblings were always there to help us. Together we all moved endless numbers of boxes, picture frames and pieces of hand-me-down furniture. With time, we all got pretty good at the whole process. And our mothers were always there with practical advice and several rolls of contact shelving paper.

At some point, we discovered the joys of hiring a professional mover, so it's been a long time since we practiced the ritual. But now, once again, the practice of family-assisted moving is revived, with our son and his girlfriend moving from Eugene up to Portland. But this time, we are the parents!! What a strange feeling. The same endless cartons, the same smell of an empty new apartment with hardwood floors, the same feeling of hope and excitement, even the same baseball play-offs on TV in the background, but now we're the old guys with the practical advice. (The funny thing is that I have no contact paper to offer, because I never learned how to do it, since Sonia always did it for me.)

My body aches from all the lifting and carrying. My mind is happy for the new life they will be living in this most exciting part of Portland. And my heart has suddenly realized how wonderful it was to have our parents and siblings helping us with all those moves, what hard work it was, and how much of an emotional investment they were all making in us.

I think I'll go call my Mom now, just as soon as I wipe away this little tear from my eye.

Being Celebrated

2010-09-13T23:32:00.000-07:00

Wednesday was our 36th wedding anniversary. It was also Erev Rosh Hashana. So when my SIL asked "did you celebrate?" the answer wasn't that simple.

Wednesday morning we gave each other anniversary cards, which turned out to be almost the same card. Each had dogs dressed as people, with very similar captions about how after awhile you start looking the same.

Wednesday night we were part of a big holiday dinner at a friend's home, so we weren't really celebrating our anniversary. But then they surprised us with a special dessert with a candle in it, and everyone sang to us. It was very sweet.

On Thursday we sang in the choir, then came home to phone calls from people who forgot to call on Wednesday. Thursday night we ate another holiday meal at someone else's home, and everyone marveled at our feat of remaining married for so long.

Friday evening we spent feverishly preparing for Saturday morning... Gershon was reading a Torah portion, and I was doing a D'var Torah. Needless to say, neither one of us was prepared. But it was an evening well-spent.

Saturday morning we each did our part in the Torah service. Then, just when we had both sat down in relief, the Rabbi called us both back up to the Bimah, and did a special Mi Shebeirach in honor of our anniversary. The entire gathering sang "Siman tov und mazel tov" for us.

Saturday night we went to our friends' house for Mah Jongg, so we didn't have a chance to go out and celebrate together until Sunday night, when we finally went out to a restaurant, ate too much and toasted each other L'chayim. Twice (for 36 years).

No cake or chocolates, no gifts or jewelry or tropical vacations, but actually our anniversary was celebrated by a lot of people. It seemed like it would be lost in the shuffle, but actually it was pretty cool.

Happy New Year

2010-09-09T08:25:00.000-07:00

Shana Tova to all of my readers (all one of you). Wishing everyone a happy, healthy, fulfilling year!

Time Traveling on the Couch

2010-09-01T01:12:00.000-07:00

I just LOVE books about time travel! From H.G. Wells' "Time Machine" to that cool story by Heinlein (sorry, I can't remember the title) to Diana Gabaldon's "Outlander," I love them all. The idea is fascinating, in either direction. So I was happy to finally read The Time-Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger. I finished it a few days ago, and man, is my head messed up !!

Each time-travel story has its own set of "rules." This one allows the time traveler to visit with his own self at another age! Yikes! And because he can go forward AND backward, he can appear to his loved ones even after the date of his death. Cool, huh?

It turns your head around a few times, but there's nothing wrong with that! It was a fun read, and it also managed to be touching and thought-provoking. I'm not sure if I want to see the movie, though. I might like to keep it in my head, just the way it is.

Is it Inevitable?

2010-08-21T18:41:00.000-07:00

I'm finding it hard not to become a cynical, grumpy old lady. Everywhere I turn, people seem impossibly stupid, selfish, and/or mean. It seems so hopeless. Once again I feel understanding for the hermit living alone with her dogs.

I don't mean to belittle my friends, who are wonderful. It's just that sometimes the rest of the world (R.O.W. as Cramer calls it) seems to outweigh them.

Time Marches Forward.... and Backward

2010-08-07T22:36:00.000-07:00

July is gone, and as it fades away, so do the raspberries. August signals the start of the end of summer, which is always bittersweet, but it brings the great consolation of blackberries! One bite of these divine miracles, and I am instantly transported back 40 years in time, to August of every summer on the Bimah Lawn of Camp Swig. And just like back in those days, it's hard to wait. You have to wait till the berries get really soft and plump before you pick them. Otherwise they taste sour. I think this is symbolic of something, but I'm not sure what.

(Yes, I hear Mel Brooks in my head, saying "dis is symbolism... it's symbolic of.... junk!")
(See Mel Brooks' great animated short: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otPkk1sUFkI )

Crafty Women

2010-07-13T22:50:00.000-07:00

This Saturday Eddy and I will be selling our pretty sparkly things at a giant, juried craft show in Newberg. The "Craft-In" arts/crafts show will be held at the historic 99-W Drive-In Theatre, from 10 am to 4 pm. Admission is free, and there is a snack bar too. Come on down!

Click here for more information.

Easy As Pie

2010-07-13T22:41:00.000-07:00

My mother-in-law came to visit, and she fell in love with our raspberries! She was like a child in a candy store. We picked and picked, and picked.

Trying to decide what to do with all the berries, Sonia kept saying "let's make a pie." I've never made a berry pie before, so I was reluctant. But the idea was firmly stuck in her head, so it was GONNA happen. Fortunately, the Joy of Cooking was up to the task, and I had a package of frozen pie shells in the freezer. It turned out to be pretty easy, we had a good time together in the kitchen, and the pie came out fabu!

B'teyavon!

First Fruits!

2010-06-28T17:42:00.000-07:00

With the crazy weather we've had, I kind of forgot that it's actually summer. So I was really surprised when i discovered that our raspberry bushes are FULL of ripe raspberries! And it isn't even July yet! This bowl is over 12" wide, and this wasn't nearly all of them.

Time to decide what to do with this year's crop. Last year I made raspberry ice cream, liqueur, vinegar, raspberry-chipotle sauce, and yogurt. This year? Not sure, but of course I'll probably start with ice cream. How could I not?

Smitten

2010-06-18T01:44:00.000-07:00

I never had a dog growing up, and was actually a little frightened of them, since a big dog knocked me down in my toddler years. My brother actually had a dog, and I got over the fear, but had no real relationship with Happy.

Then when I met Gershon and his family, Doobie was part of the package, and he was a very cool dog. I guess I bonded with him to some degree, because I really cried when he died. But then another 17 years passed before a dog came into my life.

7 years ago my kids wore down my resistance, I gave in, and we got a dog. He was my first dog, a Pug, and the boys named him Nacho. And I fell hopelessly in love. I finally understand the whole dog thing. In fact, the whole animal thing that I never comprehended as a child, when most of the girls I knew were crazy for dogs, cats, and horses. There is such an incredible spirit in animals, and such a passion between us. It became a whole new obsession for me. When my kids were little, I used to admire other people's children. But now I'm a sucker for every dog I see.

I recently read "The Art of Racing In The Rain" by Garth Stein. It's quite a tear-jerker, but in a good way. And he has created a wonderful character in the dog Enzo. He captures the beautiful love between dog and human so well. If you love dogs, read it. If you don't love dogs, read it anyway and you might feel differently.

I feel like I missed out on a lot, when all the other kids were enjoying animals while I stood aside . But I'm glad we found Nacho before my kids were entirely grown up. I think he really made a difference. As with having children, or making friends, once again you find that giving your love to someone new brings more love into your life.

I saw a greeting card that said something like "We walk side-by-side, two completely different universes, connected only by love and a leash." That's Nacho and me.

New Camera!

2010-06-10T22:18:00.000-07:00

My new camera arrived... a Nikon CoolPix S8000. I haven't learned all the ins and outs yet (well, okay, I've barely learned anything about it yet), but I did manage to take a pretty good picture of my "Seaside Garden" bracelet. See? I KNEW it was possible to get a decent shot of beadwork with a digital camera! Soon I'll post a few pix of other recent projects too. That should relieve my frustration over posting poor pictures.

Phone Home

2010-06-07T21:48:00.000-07:00

This weekend I thought "gee, I haven't talked to Sam in weeks. I should give him a call and see how he's doing." Then I realized he's not with us anymore. I can't really give him a call anymore. I can only wait for him to send me an occasional message. This is such an empty feeling.

Small and Quiet

2010-05-26T23:28:00.000-07:00

Feeling empty, I turned to my beads. And I managed to create my first free-form pendant. It's pretty nice, in greens that match the "Seaside" bracelet. It's kind of small and quiet, the way I feel right now.

I tried to take a picture of it to post, but the camera is truly a goner at this point. There should be some good electronics sales this holiday weekend... we will definitely buy a new camera. Stay tuned.

Friends are Good

2010-05-25T00:22:00.000-07:00

The funeral is over, the Shiva is over, the 7-day candle has burned all the way down, and everyone is finally back at home. But of course it feels so strange, kind of empty. Hard to grasp that someone so central to our life is gone.

Some rituals are helpful, though. And the company of people is really important. Yesterday we had a memorial service for Sam here at our house. It was gratifying to have so many people come and support us in our time of sorrow. Most of our Portland friends never met Sam, but they were able to know him a little bit, through the picture that Gershon painted with his stories, and I think everyone felt enriched by the experience.

We also made a collage of photos, which turned out to be a really therapeutic project. The memories are so sweet, as you dig through albums full of surprises. And it's amazing how much other people enjoyed the pictures too, trying to guess which little boy is Gershon, and laughing gently at the bygone fashions. Again, being surrounded by people we love was so comforting. We have built ourselves a lovely community here. Friends are good.

The Jig is Up

2010-05-14T22:36:00.000-07:00

The jig is up. It's all a sham. "Happily ever after," "growing old together," "the golden years"... all those romantic phrases... all trying to hide the ugly truth: that you get old in pain and frustration, you die, usually in a most humiliating or painful way, and the ones who are least able to manage alone are left alone for the next 20 years.

The denial as we move from our "prime" to our "golden years" is preposterous, as those approaching the chasm try desperately to cling to the mirage... trying to will it to be true, even as they try to hit the brakes, knowing deep down where they're heading. What a slap in the face the actual truth is. The jig is up. It's all a sham.

Baruch Dayan Ha'Emet

2010-05-09T23:55:00.000-07:00

My father-in-law, Sam Liberman, passed away tonight, after several months of pain and frustration. The last few days have been particularly difficult, for him and for my mother-in-law. I can't quite grasp it yet. But I hope he will be at peace.

When I left their house yesterday, and kissed him goodbye, I didn't know I was really kissing him goodbye.

Baruch Dayan Ha'emet.

Almost No Words for This

2010-05-08T22:38:00.000-07:00

Why must the end be so hard? And so long? It's agonizing for everyone, especially when we don't know if it's just the start of the end, or really near the end. Watching what my inlaws are going through right now, I am absolutely terrified of my own future, when we will be their age, and wrestling with mortality in such a difficult, painful way. And watching my own mother disintegrate is a whole other kind of terror, as I look at my own image, age-adjusted. Like I said before, aging isn't for the weak-hearted.

Decisions, Decisions!

2010-05-02T18:17:00.000-07:00

Last night I finished my latest free-form bracelet, and I'm very happy with it. For some reason, i always feel the need to give these more involved projects a name. I was hoping this one would fit the name "Herb Garden," but it doesn't feel right to me, with all the turquoise in it. So what shall I call it?

Of course it's also a fairly mediocre photo, because my digital camera is dying a slow and painful death. I'm ready to buy a new one, but torn about which one to choose. Too many choices out there!

So I'm asking for suggestions (I know I may come to regret this) on two things: what camera to buy (needs to have macro capability) and what to name this bracelet. Ready? Go!

Then Come the Tulips

2010-04-17T12:11:00.000-07:00

Tulips are blooming everywhere. Last week I saw the most amazing group of tulips... they were breathtaking! Deep purple, hot pink, goldenrod and orange. They made such an impression on me that I drove right home and pulled out my beads. I found the four closest colors on hand, decided to use Swarovski crystals for the accents in the middle row, and made this bracelet. I really LOVE this color combo!

This week i had occasion to be back at the same spot, so I tried to take a picture of the tulips with my cell phone camera. But it's so pathetic, the pix were worthless. Oh well, I am just enjoying the bracelet.

(Click on the picture to see it in more detail.)

The Passover Tree

2010-04-05T15:48:00.000-07:00

My next-door neighbors have a huge tree in their yard, bordering ours. I don't know what kind of tree it is, but it's a thing of majesty. It's gigantic, and every year in the early spring it blooms with millions of little white blossoms. (They look like apple blossoms, but they are pure white, and there are never any apples, so I'm not sure.)

Anyway, every year when this tree blossoms, it brings a smile to my face... first of all, it is GORGEOUS, and also it means that spring is coming! And despite the crazy fluctuations of the Jewish holiday calendar, The Tree always seems to bloom right before Pesach. Then the blossoms are only there for a couple of weeks, before they suddenly fall away and make you wonder if you really saw them at all. Sure enough, today the wind is blowing and as Pesach draws to a close, the blooms are being blown away. I welcome the completion of another Pesach, but I also feel a little sad as it passes away with the white petals.

Why does this feel so profound to me? The symbolism is so great... how brief and fleeting are the beautiful moments of life! We need to take a minute to smell the proverbial roses when the opportunities arise. How wonderful is the order (Seder) of the Universe, giving us comfort in the continuity of seasons and celebrations, and stability with which to face the unexpected. How incomprehensible is the number of blooms on that one tree, and by extension... the people of the world, and the expanse of the Universe! Puts your own life in perspective, doesn't it?

Who knew that a tree in someone else's yard could make me wax so philosophical? Well, you know, it's Pesach... for a little longer.

A Little More of a Good Thing

2010-03-24T14:05:00.000-07:00

I started to put away all the beads from The Lamp, but they looked so pretty sitting there together, I decided to do one more project with them first. And remember I had that one piece that didn't fit on the lamp? That was an excellent starting point.

So here it is, a free-form sculptural peyote bracelet. It doesn't have a name yet, but I'll come up with something. Meanwhile, it's good to know that if I ever need to have a matching lamp-and-bracelet ensemble, I'm good to go!

While I'm at it, I have to give a shout-out to Jeannette Cook, who taught me to go Free-form. It has brought a whole new dimension to my work. Thanks, Teach!

Grab a Chair

2010-03-12T23:09:00.000-08:00

Here's a partial view of the chair I decorated for this year's Chair Affair. It's called "Love Seat." It's about 6 or 7 inches high, and very pink. Not my usual color playground, but everyone needs to get out sometimes, right?

There are about 100 pieces for sale at this year's auction, which raises a LOT of money for Portland's Community Warehouse. Most are full-size chairs, but some are other furniture pieces, and some are paintings of chairs. I'm not sure if mine is the only mini.

Five members of ORA have contributed pieces this year: Robin Esterkin, Laurie Fendel, myself, Gary Pearlman, and Eddy Shuldman. Cool, huh?

The auction takes place on April 8th... it's a gala auction dinner. Tickets are $50 per person, or $400 for a table of 10. There will be a live auction for things like beach trips and cooking class, with the Chairs etc being sold by silent auction. If you want to see the Chairs ahead of time, there is a preview reception on Thursday evening March 25th at the Galleria downtown. Admission is free. I'll be at both events, and hope to see you there!

The Chair Affair +
Dinner & Auction
Date:   Thursday, April 8, 2010
Time:   5:30 - 9 pm
Location: The Showroom at1625 NE Sandy, Portland 97232

Click here for information and to buy tickets.

Stone and Glass

2010-03-05T17:53:00.000-08:00

At last, my beaded lamp can be revealed. It seemed like i should wait till our "Light" exhibit opened at Elements Glass Gallery before I post the photo. So now, it's time. Everyone was really kind to come out and support us last night, and I got a lot of good feedback on the lamp, which was a great feeling!

I hope to have more photos soon, from different angles. But for now, here's a picture taken last night by Sharon Segal. Thanks so much, Sharon!

The base is made of alabaster, which my darling husband drilled through to insert a light fixture holding a light bulb. The globe is a cool-looking crackly white-on-clear glass, glued to the stone base. And the beadwork is free-form sculptural peyote, using many sizes of glass seed beads and crystals. The beadwork is sewn to a cloth strip which is glued to the glass globe at the top. That is the only place where it's actually attached to the globe, but the rest of the work is stitched to fit pretty snugly. I call it "Dawn's Early Light."

Please let me know what you think. If you feel you simply MUST own this lamp, it is for sale at Elements Gallery in NW Portland!

Baruch atah adonai, eloheinu melech ha'olam, shehechiyanu v'kihimanu, v'higiyanu lazman hazeh.

Humanity Redeemed

2010-03-04T23:21:00.000-08:00

Yesterday and today were fairly lousy days. Everywhere I turned, people were being mean, or stupid, or both. By this afternoon, I was starting to understand those old ladies who just want to live with 27 dogs.

But then came our big opening-night reception at the art gallery this evening. It was beautiful. And i couldn't believe how many people showed up! It was wonderful to see people come out to support us. I got a little teary-eyed, and decided I don't really need 27 dogs. Humanity redeemed itself, at least for one more day.

Crossing the Finish Line... Going Toward the Light!

2010-02-28T23:45:00.000-08:00

Okay, boys and girls, the lamp is FINISHED! And it's out of my hands, on its way to the gallery for our exhibit. Wow, I feel so strange with neither the lamp nor the chair hanging over my head!

This Thursday, ORA's art exhibit opens at Elements Glass Gallery with a first-Thursday reception from 5:30 to 9 pm. The theme of the exhibit is "LIGHT." Please come and see the beautiful art works on display (including my lamp which you're sick of hearing about, but just dying to see) by our members and special guests. There will be food, drink, music, and ART!! Come celebrate with us.

Elements Glass Gallery
1979 NW Vaughn St.
Portland, OR 97209
503.228.0575

New Members are In!

2010-02-24T00:30:00.000-08:00

I am so bleary-eyed! It's been a long day in front of the screen, but I did it.... I made new web pages for our four new ORA members, and revised the "Artists" page that leads to each of us. Exhausting! But go take a look.... http://www.northwestjewishartists.org/artists.html

That grindstone i was talking about? The Light project? It will be a pleasure to get back to it, with no screen and no keyboard! See you tonight at the Pre-JAM Slam!!!! 7 pm at MJCC.... fun and free!

Back to the Grindstone

2010-02-22T20:52:00.000-08:00

The CHAIR is finished! It's not as extensively beaded as I had originally planned, but it's definitely cute. And cute is important, right? Very pink-and-purple, with hearts and everything. We were supposed to give it a clever name, so I called it "Love Seat." Which is almost clever.

The Love Seat will be featured for sale in the Chair Affair auction on April 8th, which is a benefit for the Portland Community Warehouse. For more info, and some amazing photos of last year's chairs, see their website: http://communitywarehouse.org/chairaffair/

So now, it's back to the grindstone for me. The Light project. Okay, you've guessed by now... it's a lamp. With beading all around the glass globe. It's been frustrating, but after a few days away from it, I think I can see it more objectively now. It's pretty nice, and everyone else seems to think it's done. Of course, I know better. It's NOT done, but it will be. Now I have a few days to add to it, and then I'll glue it to the glass at the end. Hmmm, but first I actually have to make some new web pages before Wednesday night. Oh well, it was fun visiting the Grindstone. Back in a few...

The Dark Before the Light

2010-02-18T01:11:00.000-08:00

Despite my moaning, groaning, and general whining, the project-from-heck is coming along. I got it into a presentable form to submit to the jury Tuesday night, accompanied by a note explaining that it isn't finished, but I would like their feedback. Sort of like a note-from-mom-saying-that-the-dog-ate-my-homework. Believe it or not, the jury accepted the project for the show! There have been some very dark moments during this process, and may still be more to come, but I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel (play on words, since the exhibit's theme is "Light." Clever, huh?)

Notice how I'm not telling you what it is? You'll have to come see it at the Exhibit (see info below). So now i guess I have to finish it, right? Ack!

But today I decided to take a break from all that light, and do some work on my Chair Affair project. Again, I'm not sure it will be ready on time, since they moved up the deadline. But I'll do what I can. It's a worthy cause, and a fun event. And the little dollhouse chair I bought to decorate is sooo cute! Plus, there's no yellow involved, which at this point is very appealing !

I hope a lot of people come to both of these events. Sorry, no dogs allowed.

"Light" Exhibit, featuring 20 ORA artists & associates
March 4 -14, 2010
(First Thursday reception March 4th at 5:30 pm)
Elements Gallery and Hot Shop
1979 NW Vaughn St
503.228.0575

The Chair Affair, a benefit auction for Portland Community Warehouse
Thursday, April 8, 2020
5:30 - 9:00 pm
The Bison Building
419 NE Tenth St.
503.206.5244 or linda@communitywarehouse.org for information

Flipping Out

2010-02-14T23:54:00.000-08:00

We're getting down to the wire... jury date is Tuesday night... time to put this baby together! My stomach hurts. I spent some stressful time this morning, figuring out how to piece together the pieces I've made, and where they'll sit on the glass globe. Well, guess what? They didn't all fit! I actually had to leave one out, and also had to construct one more piece to fit into an empty spot. Sigh...

But I came up with this cool piece, starting with a semi-circle I had already done (you can see it in the previous post), and adding the reverse flips to fill the space. What do you call this shape? It reminds me of that 1964 haircut... the "flip." With a tiara.

So, back to the construction. Trying to fit them together is crazy, because I have to attach them temporarily to the globe. But how? I tried 2-sided tape, then clamps. Hmmm, I didn't try rubber bands. But I ended up just scotch-taping each piece roughly into place. It looks ridiculous. But slowly slowly, I'm getting the pieces sewn to each other. Once they're all attached, I can try my plan for anchoring them to the top of the glass, and I hope to have time to add some more embellishment.

I'm really regretting how the timing worked out, because it will not look like I envisioned it. But at this point, I can only do what I can do, and hope it looks nice enough for the jury. I'm trying not to flip out.

Balance

2010-02-10T14:09:00.000-08:00

I've been working for several weeks in yellows, golds, white, with a touch of orange. Gotta tell you, i am developing a very strong urge to do something in black and purple!! Expect that to follow this project. Don't know what it will be, but it will be DARK!!

After all, a person's got to have some balance in life. You can't just eat carrots... you need chocolate too, right? Right!

Shell Beads

2010-02-09T02:03:00.000-08:00

Today a market research person asked me what I would do if stranded on a desert island. I said that after seeking food and water, I would probably collect shells and make them into beads. This, of course, is a little warped. But I'm feeling pretty warped right now, working round-the-clock on a beading project, I have beads on the brain.

I'm working on this massive project for our "Light" exhibit at Elements Glass next month. The jury is in a week, and I don't know if the project will be ready in time. Also, our ORA meeting is tonight, and I'm not sure I'll have enough of a structure to bother showing it to the group. I'll have to make that decision later today, but over the weekend I finally made peace with myself about the jury next week. I gave myself permission not to submit it. If I'm not done in time, so be it. I have a few other pieces to submit anyway, so that might be all there is. I'm not going to be stressed about it anymore, because it is not constructive. And now that I'm feeling more stoic about it, it's moving along faster, and will probably (I hope) be done in time.

I do, however, need to learn from this experience. How did I get into this last-minute position? Again? It's mostly that "can't say no" thing, which eats up a lot of my time. I really have to pick my volunteer commitments more carefully. And then there's the old time management thing, which is tied with losing weight and quitting smoking for the number-one most common vice that people strive every year to control. At this age, am I ever really going to lose weight? Or manage my time better? It seems less and less likely each year, but I have to hang onto hope, no matter how dim it may be, and keep trying to improve. Find little shells, search for a way to make them into beads.... keep trying....

The Nuisance of The Wild

2010-02-04T08:37:00.000-08:00

I am an animal lover, and I love most of them. But I don't like coyotes. I do not find them cute or beautiful or romantic or regal. They scare me for real. Especially because I have a small dog, and coyotes have invaded our neighborhood big-time.

Coyotes have been sighted on our own street for the last few weeks. My son even had a near-collision with one on his way home to our driveway. On Tuesday my husband was walking the dog and heard howling very nearby. Luckily our son happened to come by in the car, so Gary sent him ahead to look for the source of the howl. Sure enough, it was a coyote, not 100 feet away. Joel chased him away with the car, and went back to DRIVE Gary and the dog back home. Personally, I don't walk the dog on our street at all. I drive him somewhere safer, and walk with him there. This is crazy!

Yes, I understand this is all because their habitat is being destroyed. But this particular neighborhood was built almost 40 years ago, so why are they appearing here now? Well, I've been puzzled about that, but last night I think I figured it out. There are a lot of new homes being built fairly nearby. Not so close that I consider them in our neighborhood, but it's happening in so many nearby areas that I think the coyotes end up wandering over here, where there are no bulldozers, and plenty of small dogs & cats.

So at the moment we live in a state of siege. I don't know what can be done about it, or how long it will last, but we live in fear.

Angst Relieved

2010-01-27T01:34:00.000-08:00

Okay, I got over it. I decided to keep going a bit further before evaluating. And if I need to add more white behind the yellows or more golds in front, duh, I can just add them afterward. The beauty of free-form beading is you can add anything anywhere you want, right? So, just go with the flow!

Also, I had some help from looking through Margie Deeb's latest book, The Beader's Color Palette. Mostly it confirmed that I'm on the right track. But also, it was comforting, and stimulating, and put me in a better mental state. Pretty pictures and color palettes will do that!

Angst in Living Color

2010-01-24T21:57:00.000-08:00

Okay, we've got the base figured out, and hubby has the light bulb & cord almost all set, and I've finalized my choice of the globe. I even made a little sampler of colors so I can see how they each look with the light shining through. So now there are no more obstacles... time to bead! Right? Well, kind of.

I figured out the beads I want to start with, and I started. But before I got very far, I was beset with doubts. Beset, I tell you! Me! About the colors! This almost never happens to me... if there's one thing I don't generally agonize about, it's the colors. But here I am, having an existential crisis about the colors!

I thought it would be mostly yellows and golds, with accents of orange and red, kind of like the sun. Seems pretty straightforward. But the more I think about it (which I probably shouldn't do), the more I think that it won't look right that way... the light shining from behind the beads looks very different from light shining ON them. So maybe there should be a base layer of whites, with yellow etc over that. Most of my Yizkor candles have had a primarily white background, which has worked well. And THEN, I start thinking, what would go with the alabaster base? More towards the gold/tan family? And then.....

Aaaarrrrrrghghghghhhhhh!!! I can't steady my mind. Do other artists go through this a lot? I'm not used to it. Maybe it's just my recent flu, playing head games with me. Or maybe it's that unfamiliar "jury" concept. But my mind is a quivering mess of uncertainty at this moment. I think I need to set the whole thing aside until tomorrow. Perhaps things will become magically clear. Or white, or yellow, or gold, or.....

Light and Chocolate

2010-01-20T23:52:00.000-08:00

I don't really like working on art with an assigned theme. I find it stressful, especially because it usually implies a specific exhibit with a specific deadline. And yet, something really good always comes from the challenge. Right now, our ORA members are working with the self-inflicted theme of "Light," which seemed a logical choice, since that's what our name means, and because the exhibit will be in a glass gallery. But then I got to thinking I should do something with an actual light source shining through the beadwork. Of course this leads to all sorts of challenges, and surprises too. Of course, in the end, it's going to be a gorgeous project, and I'll be really proud of it, but during the process I feel stressed and nervous.

I know that some people enjoy that nervous feeling, stepping out of the comfort zone. But personally, it makes me want chocolate. A lot of chocolate. Hmmmmm... now THAT would be an interesting theme.....

Our exhibit "Light" will be held at:
Elements Glass Studio/Gallery/School
1979 NW Vaughn St.
Portland, OR 97209
503.228.0575

It will open with a First-Thursday reception on March 4, 2010. Music, food, wine, artists. The whole nine yards. Yikes! I hope there will be chocolate....

Mittens With Strings

2010-01-12T16:19:00.000-08:00

When I was 5, my mom attached a long string to my mittens, and strung them through the sleeves of my snow coat to prevent my losing them. It was a little uncomfortable, but she had good reason, based on her experience with me losing EVERYTHING. When i was 9, my grandmother bought me a beautiful Snow White wristwatch, and I lost it. I was mortified, but she kindly bought me another. I LOST IT TOO.

As I got older, the trend was refined a little. Losing things is mostly based on FORGETTING them somewhere. I lost my treasured Staff Jacket when I forgot it in a lecture hall at UCLA. I knew exactly where I left it, but it just wasn't there anymore when I realized it. I forgot keys, drivers license, purse, books, you name it. Now I knew where I left them, but still they weren't with ME.

(I only forgot to pick up my kids once.)

Now that menopause has reared its ugly and demented head, forgetting things has been raised to the level of an art. Sort of. The ugly, in-your-face kind of art. They write funny plays about it, but in one's real life, it's not funny at all. I forgot my purse twice in one night this past weekend, and therefore ended up driving to and from a friend's house three times in one evening. Twice to the synagogue in the last 20 hours because I forgot something there.... you get the picture.

So I try to figure out how I can reduce the frequency of forgetting things. One way is not to carry a purse. I do that a lot, but then when i need to use one, I'm unaccustomed to it, and forget it everywhere. I guess I could get those "clapper" keys. But sometimes I wonder if I could just tie strings to everything I take anywhere, and attach them to my clothes or my fingers. Paints a really attractive picture, doesn't it???

Sigh. Aging isn't for the faint of heart.....

A Most Unusual Day

2009-12-26T15:57:00.000-08:00

Today my Father-in-law became a Bar Mitzvah. It was a most unusual day.

Sam is 83 years old, and never had a proper Bar Mitzvah as a boy, so he elected to do it now. Instead of handing the Torah down through the generations, today's ceremony started with handing the Torah UP, from the grandchildren, to the children, to the Bar Mitzvah. When i heard the plan, it sounded a little corny, but when it actually took place, and my silver-haired husband handed the Torah over to his elderly father, I have to admit it brought tears to my eyes.

All of Sam's children and grandchildren were involved in the service in one way or another. And the members of this Los Angeles congregation did a wonderful job of planning the whole thing, bringing food, coordinating musicians, etc. Our friend from Portland even led folk-dancing, since he happened to be in L.A. at just the right time.

But there was one moment that just cracked me up, because it was so twilight-zone. The after-meal "benching" was led by well-known radio celebrity Dennis Praeger, who is an active member of the congregation. It was pretty interesting, because it was almost like a Las Vegas lounge act, with actual applause at the end! Let me tell you, this guy never met a microphone he didn't like. So then, I sent a text message to my brother to tell him Praeger was leading benching. Let's see... can you picture this... I'm sending a text message on my cell phone (on Shabbes) to say that Dennis Praeger is leading benching at the Bar Mitzvah of my 83-year-old Father-in-law. What could be unusual about any of that???

Messiah Coming Soon?

2009-11-23T11:08:00.000-08:00

Well, Michael's was very disappointing. Didn't really find anything I was looking for. Of course, that doesn't mean I left empty-handed, but you know.... now i still need to hit a proper art supply store.

But here's the big news. As soon as i finished drawing the Owl for our class homework, I took a deep breath and..... I drew my dog!!! This has been itching at the back of my mind for a few weeks.... that I could probably do it, somehow. And once the teacher presented the Owl, I felt that I could probably do Nacho. It wasn't easy, but I did it, and it actually looks like him! So I'm pretty excited. A mere two months ago I could never have considered drawing something real. And now... well, maybe the Messiah is near !

Colorful Ancient Memories

2009-11-19T23:17:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow I'm going to Michael's for a few things, including some kind of watercolor paints for our class homework. Tonight I was googling 'watercolor paints' and it brought back a memory that I haven't thought of in over 40 years! When I was a small child, maybe 5 years old, my parents bought me this metal tin of watercolor paints, but it was a really big set, with a LOT of colors. I don't remember how many, but it seemed like a HUNDRED! Each one was a small square of color, and eventually some of the colors got used up before others, which was frustrating. But all in all, I really LOVED that paint set! Can't remember anything I painted with it, but I have a distinct memory of the FEELING of it, the smell, and the excitement. Man, I love colors! Hmmmm.... I'm gonna have to exercise some self-control at the store tomorrow. Then again, sometimes self-control is overrated!

Paintbox photo from Shutterstock.com

New Toys!

2009-11-18T23:43:00.000-08:00

Who knew there were such cool toys? Last week I missed our drawing class, so I missed out on the electric eraser, but this week we were introduced to a water-brush, and watercolor pencils! These are very clever inventions, and way too much fun! You can fill the water brush with water and then take it with you, along with your watercolor paints, and paint anywhere without making (much of) a mess.

And then there's the watercolor pencils, which seem like regular colored pencils, except they're water soluble, so when you run your nifty-spiffy water brush over the drawing, the color dissolves into watercolor paint. I may be the only person in North America who didn't know about their existence, but it's news to me, and fun news at that!

The teacher also introduced us to the idea of less-is-more with regard to watercolor paints. But anyone who knows me knows this is a tough sell. Still, I tried NOT to color in the entire picture.

We actually had a fun class tonight, because only a few people showed up, so it was more casual and intimate than usual, and I think this served the teacher well. I drew a pretty good copy of a picture of a covered bridge. It's not done yet, but I'll post it when I'm finished. I got a great compliment when Gershon came home: he looked at the drawing and said "wait, I thought you couldn't draw!" Heh-heh...

Dust to Dust

2009-10-13T14:03:00.000-07:00

I just had the sad responsibility of telling my Mom that Louise Hefter passed away. Louise was one of "the moms" when we were growing up. And she and Gerry were founding members of Israel Academy, loyal supporters of my Dad's, and true friends of our family. The news was very hard for my Mom to hear, and hard for me as well.

Louise was such a special, wonderful person. Always smiling, even in the craziest, nastiest times. People always say that kind of thing about a person, how special they were. But Louise really was something else. She always made people feel so comfortable and loved. And everyone loved her. It's hard to find the words to describe her old-fashioned supportiveness.

Funny what comes to mind at this moment. When my father died, there was bedlam in our house, and among our large community of friends. The funeral was huge, the crowd at the meal afterward was enormous. But in the middle of it all, Louise took the time to make her famous eggplant parmesan just for us. Now that I know how time-consuming it is to make, I really appreciate her dedication in the middle of all the craziness that week, to make us that dish simply because I asked for it. There might have been more important ways for her to allot her time at that moment, but maybe not. I will remember that meal forever, the comfort of the food and the love that went into it.

Louise is the first of "the moms" to pass away. Of course, several of the dads are gone, but this is a new hurt. It feels scary as well as sad. Time keeps moving, and we just have to use it as well as we can.

Baruch Dayan Ha'Emet.

.

I'm a dot-com!

2009-10-11T16:58:00.000-07:00

Okay, I finally did it. I decided a long time ago to register my own domain name and pay for commercial hosting. But I never did it, mainly because I couldn't decide on the domain name. With Yahoo closing down Geocities later this month, my existing website is going to disappear, so now the pressure was on. This indecision's killin' me.... so I asked some friends their opinions: EstherBeads or CrownJewels? Can you guess what the results of this little poll were? You guessed it -- a tie!

What to do? What to do? Did a little more research today, and found that the Crown Jewels thing is a little sticky, although I think I could have CrownJewels.net. Made an executive decision to go with EstherBeads.com and I registered the domain name and ordered hosting service. Yay! So now I'm all grown-up, just like the big kids. All I have to do now is get the website established, and then upload all those ridiculous pages. I should start over from scratch, but I just don't have the time right now, and I want to have something there when people come home from the 10/25 show with my card in their hands.

Slowly, slowly, I'm getting there. After the first of the year, I'm going to get serious about re-doing the pages, and getting shopping carts for myself and for the ORA site. Dream big, little girl!

Respect the Flow

2009-10-08T11:50:00.000-07:00

Okay, we have stopped procrastinating, and hired a contractor to work on the flooding problem. They are excavating along the front length of the house, and will seal the whole foundation with a series of super-duper high-tech materials to prevent future flooding.

But you have to also address the fundamental problem, and it's fascinating to see what previous attempts are revealed as the excavation goes deeper into the ground. (See how I'm making this sound like a positive experience?) There was some kind of tar applied to the house, but either it wasn't very well done, or it just disintegrated over the years. There is also a long French Drain, which is a good idea, but was incorrectly done. (See my earlier comment on incompetence.) There are holes in the foundation itself, apparently from bolts which rusted over the years.

You have to respect the flow. The water is not going away. The rains will not stop. And the house will (we hope) continue to sit on the side of a hill. So you have to plan for those things, and accomodate as well as you can. We will replace the French Drain with a properly built one, possibly expanded to cover more area. That seems to be the best way to spread the water around over a larger, deeper area. And the series of insulations they're applying should protect the foundation from the inevitable moisture. And the trees which had to be removed will be replaced with more appropriate bushes, placed a little further away from the house.

The cost of respect? Pretty much the same as the cost of disrespect: astronomical. And rising each day. Sigh....

(Painting: "The Sound of Many Waters" by J.E. Millais)

Grapes and Mangos

2009-10-02T16:19:00.000-07:00

I started my drawing class, and the teacher insists that everyone can actually draw. We'll see about that. First assignment was to copy this picture of grapes. Most people's grapes looked more like mangos to me, and some looked like bowling balls! I guess we're not quite there yet, but it was better than I expected.

Incompetence Everywhere

2009-10-01T23:53:00.001-07:00

Can there really be that many incompetent fools in our world? How does the world continue to function? Sigh....

.

Time Flies

2009-09-29T15:17:00.000-07:00

Wow, strange year! I haven't written anything for my blog, mainly because I'm busy trying to keep the ORA blog current. I'm not cut out for two blogs. Oh well, no one reads this one anyway.

So let's see, what happened since my last entry on January 28?
Oh yeah: Facebook! This thing has been incredible! I'm up to around 200 "friends," including a wonderful number of old Solel friends. It's been so fun to catch up with people I haven't seen in 35 years! And new connections too... people you know vaguely become real "friends" when you read each other's musings on FB. I find it fascinating, and gratifying.

Also this year: L.A. in January, Safam concert at CNS, RACC computer class, the crazy shit surrounding Robby's Bar Mitzvah, Pesach at the Conroys' (dining with Duke), Maimouna, trip to Oakland (sick as a dog), all the heartache around CNS releasing Cantor Shivers, the farewell dinner and Robby-Solomon-Shabbat, Dana and Craig came to visit, Gus Hanawalt's Hawaiian wedding, Micah's UofO graduation, Sonia and I went up to visit Lucille, Lucille visited here, Jonah's Bar Mitzvah in Boston, Judith Berdichevsky passed away, Micah got a real job, Joel screwed up in schoool, Nacho's seizures, my continuing efforts with Mary Lou to find a suitable med, Marty Berger's Bar Mitzvah, our 35th anniversary trip to Vancouver and Seattle, Kim and Paris visited here last week, plus lots of Mah Jongg, many books read, and lots of ORA meetings.

Well! No wonder I haven't written... I've been kind of busy! Still, it's hard to believe that this calendar year is 3/4 finished, and we just concluded RH and Yom Kippur 5770!

And now our big ORA show is only 4 weeks away! Am I ready? Not even close! I was thinking of writing about the Bead Fest show this past weekend, but I think I should go do some beading instead.

Paying It Forward

2009-01-28T16:45:00.000-08:00

Les Sarnoff is blogging about his fight with cancer. His voice has been part of Oregonians' lives for so long, we feel he's family. Well, today he's writing about the importance of helping others, and the concept of "paying it forward." And it reminded me that I never shared this wonderful true story with you.

Last summer, some friends of ours downsized to a condo, and gave us a spare T.V. We were delighted, and wanted to thank them, so we decided to get them some sort of gift certificate. There's a coffee place they like, so I went there to get a gift card. The young woman at the cash register attempted to process the purchase, but she was clearly perturbed. The machine showed that the purchase was paid, but I hadn't actually paid yet. She pressed a LOT of buttons, cocked her head a lot, then tested the card, and concluded that there was no reason, not even any WAY for me to actually pay! I begged her to take my phone number, because the till would likely come up short at the end of the day, but she insisted "no, it's our problem."

So I walked out thinking "This is my lucky day. Maybe I should buy a lottery ticket!" And then I thought "No, I need to donate this money that I just saved, to some worthwhile cause." As i walked to my car, I considered many possible charities. But when I got in the car and turned on the ignition, the radio was already on, and the KINK disc jockey was saying ".... and they're accepting donations right now."

It was a real Twilight Zone moment! I listened carefully to hear which charity they were discussing, went straight home to check the website, and immediately made a donation online.

This became the ultimate "pay it forward." We got a free tv, our friends got free coffee, the charity got a cash donation, and Oregon's schools & students benefit. How cool is that??

A Tragic Loss

2009-01-07T23:32:00.000-08:00

This past Yom Kippur, I ventured out of my little world, and attended services at Portland's Renewal congregation, P'nai Or. It was an amazing experience, full of music and meaning and heartfelt confessions. And they did this amazing thing with Unetaneh Tokef, intertwined with Leonard Cohen's song, "Who By Fire."

Of course, the heart of this congregation has been their Rabbi, Aryeh Hirschfield. His spirit and music and passion were irresistable, and inspiring. His charisma & strong sense of ethics reminded me of my departed father. The congregation loved him, and it was easy to see why.

So, today I was more than stunned by the news of Rabbi Aryeh's untimely drowning death yesterday. Like so many in our community, I am striving unsuccessfully to make sense of this tragedy. And the words of Unetaneh Tokef just keep running through my mind.... who shall perish by water....

Everybody ever touched by Rabbi Aryeh is grieving tonight. It is unbearably sad. But there is also a certain magnificence in the power of love that binds us together in our grief. May his righteous memory be for a blessing... zecher tzadik livracha.

Grateful

2008-11-27T11:04:00.000-08:00

Micah's home for the weekend, so I have all my "critters" in the house. Even though I don't actually SEE them that much, the house just FEELS more complete. I'm thankful for my family.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Happy Birthday Nacho!

2008-10-27T16:51:00.000-07:00

Today is Nacho's 6th birthday. This year I made peanut butter cookies suitable for dogs or humans. I have a bone-shaped cookie cutter, but when I looked to find a Pug-shaped cutter, I had no luck. So I got a generic dog-shaped cutter, and developed a system of "alterations" to create Pug cookies. Here's how:

1. Cut off the upright ear, flip it over, and re-attach.
2. Cut off a little dough to shorten the snout.
3. Gently work the tail to make it longer and thinner, so you can curl it.

Voila! It's a Pug!

Happy happy birthday, Nacho!!

Love, Mommy

It's Finished!

2008-10-01T15:51:00.000-07:00

This is the finished product, "Yizkor Shoah."

The beads at the bottom are actually more purple than the picture shows, but otherwise, you get the idea.

Phew!

A Fight to the Finish!

2008-09-26T16:22:00.001-07:00

My struggle with this beading project continues. First, the thread kept breaking and tangling. Then, one of the beads broke, which meant I had to re-do a whole section of the project. It was tempting to give up at that point. But I've come to realize that this is a challenge to my determination. And I am VERY determined: this project will be completed, and it will be exhibited. So I bit the bullet, and re-did that whole section.

Finally the beadwork was completed, and it was time to fit it over the glass candle holder. Guess what? It didn't fit! The beading was so tight (yes, that's what broke the bead), it actually broke the glass!! I'll tell you... the sight of all that broken glass in my hands was very powerful, since this is a Holocaust Yizkor candle!

So, what does one do at that point? How can it work as a Yizkor candle cover if it won't fit over the glass? Well, first I sulked for a few days. Then I sat down with a whole box of yizkor candle glasses, and tried every single one, till I found one that fits! It turns out that different brands are slightly different sizes, and the weird brand from Israel fits just fine. Heh-heh! Point for Esther.

But this thing doesn't give up! Next thing, it turned out that the glass I chose was cracked. Sigh, back to the box. I found another that would work, but the candle is very firmly melted into the glass, and I'm having a surprisingly hard time getting it out. Fear not, though, I will prevail. The candle will come out, the label will come off, and the candle will go back in properly. And this piece WILL be exhibited at our Art Show on October 12th.

It's a Holocaust piece, it's important, and it's been an amazing challenge. But I am determined to have my artistic voice be heard. After the show, I will post a picture of the finished piece. But I hope everyone will come and see it in person.

Celebration of Art
Sunday, October 12, 2008
10 am - 4 pm
at MJCC
6651 SW Capitol Hwy, Portland

Go With The Flow??

2008-09-07T00:58:00.000-07:00

Okay, I think I figured it out. The metaphor, or whatever. The flow of water is mirroring the flow of.... money! There's that expression "the money flowed like water." Well, the money's been leaking/hemorraging, and this water flooding thing isn't gonna help.

Also we've narrowed down the mystery of where the water's coming from. It has something to do with a broken sprinkler. But I fear that is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. The question is, WHY does a broken sprinkler outside make it flood inside? And why did it happen 2 years ago, and again now, but never in the time between? Stay tuned as Holmes & Poirot continue their zany madcap investigation!

Broken Thread

2008-08-29T17:18:00.001-07:00

On a similar note, I'm working on a new piece of beadwork. And the thread keeps breaking, tangling, or getting frayed. I'm not sure if this is because it's a bad spool of thread, or if it's because it's a Holocaust piece which will be a challenge till the very end. Next time I work on it, I think I'll try a different spool of thread, because this is getting ridiculous.

I must say, though, that so far it looks really good. I think it will be incredibly striking when it's done. Stay tuned.

It's Always Something

2008-08-29T17:07:00.000-07:00

Just so you don't tempt the Evil Eye, the joy never lasts long. Some new, icky challenge usually emerges to make you forget the revelry. In this case, it's flooding downstairs. Again. Mysterious flooding. Two-professionals-have-come-out-and-neither-can figure-out-where-the-water's-coming-from flooding. No-point-fixing-the-carpet-since-it's-bound-to-happen-again flooding. Heavy sigh.

They say that when bad things keep happening, it often mirrors something going on in your emotional life. Like if you keep having car trouble, or losing your keys, it might point to a problem with the direction of your life. Or if you keep getting sore throats, there's probably a communication problem. Things bursting might mean you're holding something inside that needs to come out. Great, but what does mysterious flooding mean? What does leaking mean? Does it imply... ummm... incontinence? I can't figure this thing out, practically or figuratively. And until someone does figure it out, our home is in limbo. Another heavy sigh...

It's The Law

2008-08-26T14:56:00.000-07:00

My son informs me that I shouldn't be so excited about my new kitchen counters, stove, and sink. He says that since I'm a middle-aged suburban woman, having my kitchen re-done is pretty much the law.

I beg to differ. Not everyone gets to do this. And I have been wanting this even longer than I've been middle-aged !!! So, regardless of what he says, I have to quote my old friend Judy: "SQUEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAALLLLLLL !!!!" Yes, I'm happy, and not ashamed to say so.

Why am I so happy about it?? Well, just LOOK!!!

.........
Old kitchen with ridiculous mauve .........the ugly, slow, spills-stay-forever.
tiles, insane top-mounted ugly .............stovetop!
sink, AND... ...............................................

.........
..New kitchen with cool granite, no ..............the beautiful, super-fast,
...grout, big, proper under-mounted.........spill-proof, smooth glass stovetop!
sink AND.....

The process isn't entirely over, but we're getting there. And it's such a great feeling every time I walk into the kitchen. I know I'm lucky, and I'm truly grateful.

.

Molly's in the House!!

2008-08-24T16:06:00.000-07:00

I grew up with all brothers, then had two sons at once, and now we have a male dog. I've never had any other female in the house, except my Mom. So having a female dog with us for a few weeks is really interesting!

Nacho is a "man's man," and is totally devoted to Daddy. But Molly, our guest, is definitely attached to me. And she has such a different aura than Nacho. I could grow to like this! She's young and energetic, but not so territorial. More curious, and also more excitable. Sound like anyone in your house?

Molly is such a sweet dog. But the poor thing is having a rough summer. First, her family's home burned down, with her inside. Luckily the firefighters were told to look for her, and they found her in time. Then she lived in two new & unfamiliar places. Then they brought her to our home and left her in our care for two weeks. Who knows what she's thinking at this point!?

So, it's no surprise that she's a little jumpy at the sound of every little noise. However, last Monday's thunder storm was no LITTLE noise! Personally, it was the worst I've ever experienced. And Nacho wasn't thrilled either. But poor Molly, she went nuts. She started running around the house at top-speed, barking her head off. I was reminded of the book "Marley and Me." I tried to hold her in my arms, but she didn't know me well enough to take comfort from me. She had only been here 4 days. I felt so bad for her. But then I got her up on the bed, and started rubbing her tummy, and she liked that too much to fight it! So she calmed down, and I think we started bonding. With each new thunderclap, I rubbed her tummy, and after a few, she let me hold her in my arms. Then we just sat through it together, Molly, Nacho and me.

Now we're having a good time. I'm sure she still misses her family, and will be ecstatic when they return, but in the meantime she seems more confident here. Nacho has taught her to use the doggy door, and she loves our big back yard. She gets out there and does the sheepdog-thing, running faster than lightning until she collapses. Nacho has also taught her to keep her nose out of his food bowl. He tries to pretend he doesn't like her, but I think he's getting to like playing with her.

Molly's a funny girl, and she has her own little quirks. I'm having fun experiencing her. I just hope we don't have any more thunder!

Sensory Overload

2008-07-31T21:44:00.000-07:00

A 3-hour drive in each direction, a 3-hour class with a famous beading "Diva," an 8-hour class with a math-genius beader, a cheap hotel, and a full-sized bead show with over 50 bead vendors... squeeze all of these into one weekend, and you have serious Sensory Overload!

Of course, I enjoyed every minute of it. But when I got home, I was exhausted for at least a week! All-in-all, I'd say that my weekend at the Puget Sound Bead Festival was a total success. I really loved both of the classes I took, and was pleasantly surprised at how BIG the vendor show has become. Waaaaay more vendors than I (or my wallet) expected.

I'm posting pictures of how my class projects are SUPPOSED to look.... because mine aren't exactly finished... and probably won't look as nice as these. But you get the basic idea of the crazy stuff I was working on.

And of course, every time you take a new class, it's so stimulating. You start getting all sorts of new ideas, and that's what I was hoping for. If you haven't taken a class lately, try it! You'll like it!

"Entangled Cubes".................. "The Curl"
by Janet Walker...................... by Jeanette Cook

.

Emotional Roller Coaster

2008-06-27T13:54:00.000-07:00

Well, I was relieved that Micah landed safely in Israel. Then came several days of happy phone calls, hearing that he was having a good time.

Then came the call from the Israeli Consulate, informing us that they consider Micah an Israeli citizen ... oops. We didn't dream that Gary's Israeli birth would affect Micah's citizenship! But apparently he was supposed to have an Israeli passport, and needed to get an exemption from military service! Yikes! He's never even been there! So then we were totally stressed, trying to get a straight answer in the middle of the night, about whether he would be able to come home.

Long story short, he arrived back in New York last night - hooray!! And today he landed in SFO, and plans to sleep for a day before sightseeing. I'll be REALLY glad when he gets back here Monday night.

I think a parent's emotional journey never ends.

The Eagle Has Landed

2008-06-18T21:16:00.000-07:00

Okay, he called the next day, when he got his rental phone in Israel. How exciting! Heh-heh, then he called again to ask how to use the converter thingy. Ahh, all is back to normal , give or take 10,000 miles! I'm looking forward to hearing his take on the whole adventure when he returns.

Separation Anxiety

2008-06-15T22:04:00.000-07:00

My son is in San Francisco, leaving in a few minutes on a red-eye to New York, where he will catch a flight tomorrow morning to Israel! This is the first time my baby has left North America. And right now is the first time in years that I've been completely out of contact with him. We've been text-messaging today, but now there's no more communication till he gets that rent-a-cell-phone in Israel. I'm very excited for the adventure that he will have, but at this moment I feel very strange and disjointed. I'll feel better when he lands and contacts us. Maybe he'll call from JFK.... nah, not likely. Ah, the emotional journey of parenthood.... Happy Fathers' Day, everyone!

A Bright Idea

2008-05-23T23:20:00.000-07:00

I've been waiting to update the home page of our ORA website, until we had our new member roster set in May. I thought we would be adding some new members. But actually, it worked out differently. A few people are taking a leave, and we're putting off new memberships until after the October show. So now there are only 9 full-fledged members. But I have all these cool pages I worked so hard on for the departing members, and I hate to waste them. So I came up with the idea of starting an Alumni page! This way, we still have access to those people's pages.

So I re-did the home page to reflect our current members, and I re-did the "Artists" page, adding a link to a new "Alumni" page. I got lots of compliments right away, so I feel good about it. Soon there will also be a new page for this Fall's guest artists.

Meanwhile, I'm taking a Dreamweaver class this summer, so I should soon be able to generate new web pages in that more contemporary format. Once I have that under my belt, I will feel better equipped to take on website design clients. I'm looking forward to that; I think there's a real need out there for artists and small private businesses.

New Web Page

2008-04-17T16:08:00.000-07:00

I get frustrated when things can't be 'just right' or totally complete. So I wrestled with making a new webpage for our recent ORA exhibits.

There were two separate shows, but they had related themes, so some pieces were in both shows. I didn't want that much repetition, so I decided to just do one big page.

But then, I don't have pictures of all the pieces displayed; not even close! So I had to readjust my expectations, and tried to have each artist represented by at least one piece. It's not perfect, but it will do. And the page came out pretty nicely!

Take a look, and tell me what you think:
http://www.northwestjewishartists.org/ExodusMiriam.html http://www.northwestjewishartists.org/ExodusMiriam.html

.

A Big Step

2008-03-02T00:06:00.000-08:00

I finally did it. I summoned the courage to approach a store owner about carrying my work. Not just any store.... Afikomen, the beautiful Jewish gift shop/book store in Berkeley. Gershon and I were going to be in the area for a Bar Mitzvah, so I e-mailed ahead to ask if I could bring some things to show them. And they said yes! So I brought in some work on Friday, and they took a number of kippot and Hamsa pendants on the spot!

I know this seems like such a no-brainer, but for me it's a really big step, and I'm really excited about it. They carry a lot of beautiful Judaica in this shop, and I think they have a good mailing list, so it's an honor to be represented there.

Afikomen Judaica
3042 Claremont Ave
Berkeley, CA 94705
510.655.1977
877.284.2345

I Opened The Windows Today!!

2008-02-27T17:37:00.000-08:00

The sun came out today, for real. It's been hinting here and there for a few days, but today it was HERE! If you're in Los Angeles, this means nothing to you. But if you're here in Portland, you're one happy camper!

I actually opened the windows in the living room, kitchen, and bedroom. There's oxygen everywhere! Not sure if I remember how to breathe this stuff, but I'll do my best !

Good job, Big Guy!

Lunar Eclipse

2008-02-21T23:55:00.001-08:00

I almost forgot about the lunar eclipse last night! But when I was driving to the JCC around 7 pm, I noticed a lot of people standing on various sidewalks and looking up at the sky. When I arrived, I realized what they were all looking at. And the view from the parking lot was perfect! The moon was almost fully eclipsed at that point, and it was mesmerizing. I had that familiar sci-fi-movie feeling again, almost unable to move, filled with wonder.

The situation was virtually opposite of our last eclipse, but the feeling was similar. Last time, about a year ago, the eclipse ocurred in the wee hours of the morning here on the West Coast. I stayed up for it, and stepped quietly through the sliding glass door to the backyard deck. Standing in the silence, I heard throughout the neighborhood the soft sounds of sliding glass doors! It was so sweet. We couldn't talk to each other, but we all knew the others were there with us, fascinated and thrilled at this amazing occurence.

This time, I was in the midst of the hustle and bustle of people coming and going, but once again everyone was connected by this incredible thing, fascinated and thrilled again.

As I've said before: Good job, Big Guy!

Milestone Project

2008-02-20T23:41:00.000-08:00

I'm starting to cogitate about a potential project. This summer will be the 15th anniversary of my "career" in beadwork, and I'd like to create something special to commemorate it. I have no idea yet about what form it will take, but the traditional gift for a 15th anniversary is Crystal. So I figure I have to do something with crystals, right? Funny thing is, after all the crystal I've used throughout these 15 years, nothing is whispering to me.... yet! But I'm sure that the beads will begin to speak... stay tuned.....

Happy Birthday To Me!

2008-02-12T23:06:00.000-08:00

Today was a funny birthday. Gershon's still out of town, so I was left to my own devices. When I realized that this was the only night this week that I don't have any outside obligations, I decided that staying home would be a good celebration, and Nacho would appreciate it. So I picked up some dinner and a single-serving treat from the bakery, and partied-hearty with Nacho. Heh-heh, we had fun!

Plus, all day I received birthday greetings from all over the world: from Manila to Colombia, to Boston, to Los Angeles, to Oakland to Eugene... the calls & e-mails kept coming. It was heart-warming... nothing could mean more!

So thank you, everyone, from a really OLD person in Lake Oswego.

Opening Night

2008-02-08T13:14:00.000-08:00

People are wonderful! So many people came out to join our opening night reception last night! It was lovely.

This was the first time we've worked with a theme, which was a challenge. But our members rose to the task beautifully. So many of the works are so impressive, and inspiring.

If you haven't seen the exhibit yet, get over there!! It's there until Feb 24th.

"Exodus: Our Journeys"
An exhibit by ORA: Northwest Jewish Artists

February 7 - 24, 2008

Oregon Jewish Museum
310 NW Davis St.
Portland, Oregon

A Wonderful Musical Experience

2008-02-03T15:38:00.000-08:00

I haven't written much lately, because I've been so busy with this Sefardic weekend our choir was producing. A lot of pressure, stress, and frustration accompanied our hopes, hard work, and rehearsals. By Thursday evening, when we finally met our guest performer, Cantor Ramon Tasat, I was pretty much a frazzled wreck. I guess the rest of the choir was too, because frankly we didn't sound so good at rehearsal that night. But this guy, Dr. Tasat, was a wonder. Setting aside jet-lag and disappointment, he stepped up and took over guiding the choir, spending 3 exhausting hours lifting our performance in a most gracious way. I was amazed.

The weekend's events included Cantor Tasat leading services on Friday night, with the choir singing, followed by a huge congregational dinner, Sefardic-style, then Cantor Tasat participating in Saturday morning's service, and concluding with the big concert performance on Saturday night, with the choir joining him on a number of songs. Every part was a wonderful success.

It's not just that Cantor Tasat has a lovely voice, or that he plays beautiful Spanish-style guitar. It's not just the selection of songs, or his lovely commentaries about the songs and about Sefardic life and culture. It's about his spirit; it was amazing. His dealings with our choir, our congregation, and our audience were generous, graceful, and inspiring. The concert lifted my soul; the experience of dealing with this human healed some of my wounds.

In our daily lives, we meet so many challenging people. But once in awhile, we meet someone special, who enhances our lives, and it's so gratifying. At those moments, I sometimes look upward and say "good job, Big Guy!"

Wow, That Was Easy!

2008-02-03T15:34:00.000-08:00

We put up all of our art at the Oregon Jewish Museum this morning. Why was it easy? Because we had a design angel,
Fred Harwin, helping us arrange the displays. It's always exciting seeing everyone's latest work. But it's usually difficult to
coordinate our display needs, and make it all look good. But Fred stepped in, at our request, and just made magic! We were done in two hours! Eleven people!

So, THANK YOU to Fred. And to everyone else: come see our show!! Details below.

Evolution of a Project

2008-02-02T23:49:00.000-08:00

I hate deadlines! But they are a part of life. Deadline for new projects to be included in our upcoming ORA exhibit at OJM: February 3rd. I've been working on this Yizkor candle cover during the past 2 weeks.

What an odyssey! Started in Los Angeles at the in-laws' house, with intrigued nieces, nephews, and cousins looking on. Trying to explain what that thin blue strip would eventually become. Continued through days of sitting at my Mom's bedside in the hospital. Spilling beads as I worked on the airplane. Frantically finishing tonight, after our big choir concert. Dunking in water and blow-drying it on the glass, hoping fervently that the thread would shrink to eliminate that little bulge. (It worked - thank you, HaShem!)

This Yizkor candle cover is a memorial to the prophetess Miriam, as part of our Exodus exhibit. Come see all of our offerings:

"Exodus: Our Journeys"
February 7 - 24, 2008

Oregon Jewish Museum
310 NW Davis St.
Portland, Oregon

'First Thursday' opening reception this Thursday, February 7th, 5-8 pm. Free admission.

Candle Ceremony??

2008-01-20T15:09:00.000-08:00

First, let me make something clear. I can't stand candle-lighting ceremonies. They are phony, awkward, contrived, and I REALLY hate those forced rhymes. Any questions so far?

Now, let me brag a little about my very cool niece,
Hannah Liberman.

Hannah's Bat Mitzvah was yesterday. Of course she did a great job with her Parasha, Haftara, and drash. (Of course she did; she's a Liberman!) But here's what was impressive. As part of her preparation for her Bat Mitzvah, Hannah chose FIVE charities to support. Five!!

What does this have to do with candle-lighting ceremonies? Well, get this....

Each table at her reception was decorated in relation to one of the five charities. And then, when it came time for the... shudder.... candle-lighting ceremony.... oh, this is good. First of all, there was no hokey candelabra; just five cute chunky candles. One for each charity. And instead of calling up relatives from distant places with painful rhymes, Hannah called up EVERYONE from each table assigned to each charity. So, every single person in attendance was invited to come up and drop a symbolic token from their assigned charity into a huge bin. This represented Hannah's donations to the charities, and encouraged each person there to donate as well.

Bravo, Hannah! Overcoming tackiness is good; being a role model is GREAT!!

Love,

Aunt Esther

A Big Success!

2007-12-10T15:11:00.000-08:00

It was long, and we were tired, but the Holiday Market of the French American International School was a success!

Rosana and I had tables right next to each other, which was nice. I had another jewelry vendor on my other side, and we all had a good time. It was entertaining to watch all the goings-on, from students on stilts, to classes singing Christmas carols, to contortionists, to the French wine guys flirting with the young women, to kids trying to persuade Moms that they need their ears pierced.... you get the idea .

And in between, Rosana and I each sold a healthy amount of work, so we were happy.

That's my last show of the season, so I'm ready to rest. Think that will happen?

Angels & Crepes!

2007-12-05T22:56:00.000-08:00

I haven't made angel earrings in a long time! But it seemed a good idea to stock up for this show. It was kind of fun... not what you'd call "art," but sort of a guilty pleasure . It brought back memories of my early days of beading. And now I have a lot of them for the Holiday Market this weekend. I hope it will go well. I've never done such a long show, but I think it will be worth it. Not just for the sales, but new exposure, which is so important.

I hope you will come and see me. And while you're there, get some freshly-made crepes, sample some French wines, and taste some fine chocolate! Maybe you can watch my booth for me, so that I can check out those tasty things myself!!

Details in the posting below:

Don't Forget the Crepes!

2007-11-29T21:59:00.000-08:00

Be sure to remember to come visit Rosana and me as we sell our artwork at the Holiday Market of the French American International School of Portland.

In addition to about 45 vendors, there will be winery representatives hosting wine tastings, a chocolatier, fresh crepes made on-the-spot, french pastries, and so on. This is going to be so much fun!

The event is being held Saturday, Dec. 8th from 9 am to 6 pm, at:

French American International School
8500 NW Johnson Street
Portland, Oregon 97229
Ph: (503) 292.7776

There is also a preview for the school's families on Friday from 3 to 6 pm. If you can't come Saturday, come on Friday, but be ready for carpool traffic!

Featured Artist

2007-11-21T11:22:00.000-08:00

Did you notice that I'm the featured artist on our ORA Blog page? Check it out:
northwestjewishartists.blogspot.com

Our New Nephew

2007-11-20T19:29:00.000-08:00

Life goes on. My brother and his wife are so excited about the arrival of their new puppy. They named him Elvis. He's a "Schnoodle," which is a Schnauzer-Poodle mix. You know about the designer dogs, right? They used to be called mutts, or mongrels. Now they're 'designer dogs', and they cost more than a pure-breed! But I gotta admit, he's adorable. And since he's half poodle, the idea is that he won't shed much. With his black face and bottom, and white in the middle, he looks kind of like a saddle shoe! I can't wait to meet him, but it won't be until January. By then he'll be quite a bit bigger, but that's okay; I'm sure I'll still be crazy over him.

I hope this works out for them. They've wanted a dog for a long time. And we get a lot of joy out of ours. Hmmmm.... I should post a picture of him, too! Heeeeeeeere's.... Nacho!

Best-Laid Plans

2007-11-19T15:35:00.000-08:00

Years ago I read a semi-humorous newspaper column about how arrogant we are to think we can plan our day, let alone our year or our life. One can never really know, or control, what will happen. I am constantly reminded of the wisdom of that column.

So yesterday was the Hannuka Gift Fair that we've all planned for and worked toward. Hadassah did a lovely job of advertising and preparing everything, and everyone "planned" for a festive and successful event.

But no one could foresee the passing of Jewish Portland's pioneering leader, Rabbi Yonah Geller of Shaarie Torah. His funeral was held yesterday at 1:00 pm, and was of course the focal event of our entire community. Many people made the effort to come and support the Hannukah Fair vendors earlier in the day, which I found very touching. But after 1 pm, the place was very quiet.

Of course, it was disappointing for the hosts and participants in the Hannukah Fair. But really, it wouldn't say much for Rabbi Geller if his passing DIDN'T have a profound effect on every Jewish gathering in Portland. Life goes its own way, and we have no choice but to follow. Death has its own commands as well, far byond our our feeble efforts at "control."

Baruch Dayan Ha'emet.

Hannukah Gift Fair This Sunday!

2007-11-14T19:42:00.000-08:00

All the Hannuka vendors you could want, all in one place! And food, and music. And I'll have a table there, of course.

When: Sunday, November 18, 2007
9 am - 4 pm
Where: Congreation Neveh Shalom
2900 SW Peaceful Lane, Portland

Sponsored by Portland chapter of Hadassah

Come and see me there!!

French American School Holiday Market !

2007-11-12T19:46:00.000-08:00

This is very cool! Rosana and I have applied to be vendors at this year's Holiday Market at the French American International School of Portland. We went out to see the site last week, and we were very impressed with their plans for the event.

In addition to about 45 vendors, there will be winery representatives hosting wine tastings, a chocolatier, fresh crepes made on-the-spot, french pastries, and so on. It should be a LOT of fun!

The event is being held Friday, Dec. 7th and Saturday, Dec. 8th at:

French American International School
8500 NW Johnson Street
Portland, Oregon 97229
Ph: (503) 292.7776

Don't miss it!!

Go !!!

2007-10-28T21:49:00.000-07:00

Our "Celebration of Art" was a big success! I am sooo happy! The exhibit was beautiful, the musicians were wonderful, the customers were generous and supportive. Everyone seemed to really enjoy the event. Personally, I had the best show I've ever had, by far. I'm grateful to everyone involved. And really glad we hired Rosanne to be our event coordinator. She made all the difference in the world.
And I'm really tired... Good night.
(Click here for pictures.)

Get Set....

2007-10-26T21:54:00.000-07:00

Well, we set up the Social Hall at Neveh Shalom yesterday for our upcoming Art Show. Everything but the art itself... tables, grids,
glass cases, lights, draping, flowers. It looks amazing! And man, my back hurts today! Of course, as always, it was interesting to watch the human interactions. There was excitement, nervousness, tension, pettiness, encouragement. Laughter, hugs, teeth-grinding, whispers, eye-rolling, just about everything. It's a very human thing, mounting a show.

It will all come to a head Sunday morning, as we bring in all of our artworks, and commence THE SHOW. It looks like we'll have good attendance... most people in the community seem to have noticed our flyer in the JewReview. I have high hopes for this show, and I think all the other ORA members do too. Wish us good luck... and come see us!

A Celebration of Art!
Sunday, October 28, 2007
9 am - 3 pm
Congregation Neveh Shalom
2900 Peaceful Lane
Portland, Oregon
Admission: Free