Is it Inevitable?

I'm finding it hard not to become a cynical, grumpy old lady.  Everywhere I turn, people seem impossibly stupid, selfish, and/or mean.  It seems so hopeless.  Once again I feel understanding for the hermit living alone with her dogs.

I don't mean to belittle my friends, who are wonderful.  It's just that sometimes the rest of the world (R.O.W. as Cramer calls it) seems to outweigh them.

Time Marches Forward.... and Backward

July is gone, and as it fades away, so do the raspberries.  August signals the start of the end of summer, which is always bittersweet, but it brings the great consolation of blackberries!  One bite of these divine miracles, and I am instantly transported back 40 years in time, to August of every summer on the Bimah Lawn of Camp Swig. And just like back in those days, it's hard to wait.  You have to wait till the berries get really soft and plump before you pick them. Otherwise they taste sour. I think this is symbolic of something, but I'm not sure what.

(Yes, I hear Mel Brooks in my head, saying "dis is symbolism... it's symbolic of.... junk!")
(See Mel Brooks' great animated short:   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otPkk1sUFkI )

Crafty Women

This Saturday Eddy and I will be selling our pretty sparkly things at a giant, juried craft show in Newberg.  The "Craft-In"  arts/crafts show will be held at the historic 99-W Drive-In Theatre, from 10 am to 4 pm.  Admission is free, and there is a snack bar too.  Come on down!

Click here for more information.

Easy As Pie

My mother-in-law came to visit, and she fell in love with our raspberries! She was like a child in a candy store. We picked and picked, and picked.

Trying to decide what to do with all the berries, Sonia kept saying "let's make a pie."  I've never made a berry pie before, so I was reluctant.  But the idea was firmly stuck in her head, so it was GONNA happen.  Fortunately, the Joy of Cooking was up to the task, and I had a package of frozen pie shells in the freezer.  It turned out to be pretty easy, we had a good time together in the kitchen, and the pie came out fabu!

B'teyavon!

First Fruits!

With the crazy weather we've had, I kind of forgot that it's actually summer.  So I was really surprised when i discovered that our raspberry bushes are FULL of ripe raspberries!  And it isn't even July yet!  This bowl is over 12" wide, and this wasn't nearly all of them.

Time to decide what to do with this year's crop.  Last year I made raspberry ice cream, liqueur, vinegar, raspberry-chipotle sauce, and yogurt. This year?  Not sure, but of course I'll probably start with ice cream. How could I not?

Smitten

I never had a dog growing up, and was actually a little frightened of them, since a big dog knocked me down in my toddler years.  My brother actually had a dog, and I got over the fear, but had no real relationship with Happy.

Then when I met Gershon and his family, Doobie was part of the package, and he was a very cool dog.  I guess I bonded with him to some degree, because I really cried when he died.  But then another 17 years passed before a dog came into my life.

7 years ago my kids wore down my resistance, I gave in, and we got a dog. He was my first dog, a Pug, and the boys named him Nacho.  And I fell hopelessly in love.  I finally understand the whole dog thing. In fact, the whole animal thing that I never comprehended as a child, when most of the girls I knew were crazy for dogs, cats, and horses. There is such an incredible spirit in animals, and such a passion between us. It became a whole new obsession for me.  When my kids were little, I used to admire other people's children. But now I'm a sucker for every dog I see.

I recently read "The Art of Racing In The Rain" by Garth Stein.  It's quite a tear-jerker, but in a good way. And he has created a wonderful character in the dog Enzo.  He captures the beautiful love between dog and human so well.  If you love dogs, read it.  If you don't love dogs, read it anyway and you might feel differently.

I feel like I missed out on a lot, when all the other kids were enjoying animals while I stood aside . But I'm glad we found Nacho before my kids were entirely grown up.  I think he really made a difference. As with having children, or making friends, once again you find that giving your love to someone new brings more love into your life.

I saw a greeting card that said something like  "We walk side-by-side, two completely different universes, connected only by love and a leash."  That's Nacho and me.

New Camera!

My new camera arrived... a Nikon CoolPix S8000.  I haven't learned all the ins and outs yet (well, okay, I've barely learned anything about it yet), but I did manage to take a pretty good picture of my "Seaside Garden" bracelet.  See?  I KNEW it was possible to get a decent shot of beadwork with a digital camera!  Soon I'll post a few pix of other recent projects too.  That should relieve my frustration over posting poor pictures.

Phone Home

This weekend I thought "gee, I haven't talked to Sam in weeks.  I should give him a call and see how he's doing."  Then I realized he's not with us anymore.  I can't really give him a call anymore.  I can only wait for him to send me an occasional message. This is such an empty feeling.

Small and Quiet

Feeling empty, I turned to my beads.  And I managed to create my first free-form pendant. It's pretty nice, in greens that match the "Seaside" bracelet. It's kind of small and quiet, the way I feel right now.

I tried to take a picture of it to post, but the camera is truly a goner at this point. There should be some good electronics sales this holiday weekend... we will definitely buy a new camera.  Stay tuned.

Friends are Good

The funeral is over, the Shiva is over, the 7-day candle has burned all the way down, and everyone is finally back at home. But of course it feels so strange, kind of empty. Hard to grasp that someone so central to our life is gone.

Some rituals are helpful, though. And the company of people is really important.  Yesterday we had a memorial service for Sam here at our house.  It was gratifying to have so many people come and support us in our time of sorrow.  Most of our Portland friends never met Sam, but they were able to know him a little bit, through the picture that Gershon painted with his stories, and I think everyone felt enriched by the experience.

We also made a collage of photos, which turned out to be a really therapeutic project.  The memories are so sweet, as you dig through albums full of surprises.  And it's amazing how much other people enjoyed the pictures too, trying to guess which little boy is Gershon, and laughing gently at the bygone fashions.  Again, being surrounded by people we love was so comforting.  We have built ourselves a lovely community here.  Friends are good.

The Jig is Up

The jig is up. It's all a sham.  "Happily ever after," "growing old together," "the golden years"... all those romantic phrases... all trying to hide the ugly truth: that you get old in pain and frustration, you die, usually in a most humiliating or painful way, and the ones who are least able to manage alone are left alone for the next 20 years.

The denial as we move from our "prime" to our "golden years" is preposterous, as those approaching the chasm try desperately to cling to the mirage... trying to will it to be true, even as they try to hit the brakes, knowing deep down where they're heading. What a slap in the face the actual truth is. The jig is up. It's all a sham.

Baruch Dayan Ha'Emet

My father-in-law, Sam Liberman, passed away tonight, after several months of pain and frustration. The last few days have been particularly difficult, for him and for my mother-in-law. I can't quite grasp it yet. But I hope he will be at peace.

When I left their house yesterday, and kissed him goodbye, I didn't know I was really kissing him goodbye.

Baruch Dayan Ha'emet.

Almost No Words for This

Why must the end be so hard? And so long? It's agonizing for everyone, especially when we don't know if it's just the start of the end, or really near the end. Watching what my inlaws are going through right now, I am absolutely terrified of my own future, when we will be their age, and wrestling with mortality in such a difficult, painful way.  And watching my own mother disintegrate is a whole other kind of terror, as I look at my own image, age-adjusted.  Like I said before, aging isn't for the weak-hearted.

Decisions, Decisions!

Last night I finished my latest free-form bracelet, and I'm very happy with it.  For some reason, i always feel the need to give these more involved projects a name.  I was hoping this one would fit the name "Herb Garden," but it doesn't feel right to me, with all the turquoise in it. So what shall I call it?

Of course it's also a fairly mediocre photo, because my digital camera is dying a slow and painful death.  I'm ready to buy a new one, but torn about which one to choose. Too many choices out there!

So I'm asking for suggestions (I know I may come to regret this) on two things: what camera to buy (needs to have macro capability) and what to name this bracelet.  Ready? Go!

Then Come the Tulips

Tulips are blooming everywhere.  Last week I saw the most amazing group of tulips... they were breathtaking! Deep purple, hot pink, goldenrod and orange.  They made such an impression on me that I drove right home and pulled out my beads.  I found the four closest colors on hand, decided to use Swarovski crystals for the accents in the middle row, and made this bracelet.  I really LOVE this color combo!

This week i had occasion to be back at the same spot, so I tried to take a picture of the tulips with my cell phone camera. But it's so pathetic, the pix were worthless.  Oh well, I am just enjoying the bracelet.

(Click on the picture to see it in more detail.)

The Passover Tree

My next-door neighbors have a huge tree in their yard, bordering ours. I don't know what kind of tree it is, but it's a thing of majesty. It's gigantic, and every year in the early spring it blooms with millions of little white blossoms. (They look like apple blossoms, but they are pure white, and there are never any apples, so I'm not sure.)

Anyway, every year when this tree blossoms, it brings a smile to my face... first of all, it is GORGEOUS, and also it means that spring is coming!  And despite the crazy fluctuations of the Jewish holiday calendar, The Tree always seems to bloom right before Pesach. Then the blossoms are only there for a couple of weeks, before they suddenly fall away and make you wonder if you really saw them at all.  Sure enough, today the wind is blowing and as Pesach draws to a close, the blooms are being blown away. I welcome the completion of another Pesach, but I also feel a little sad as it passes away with the white petals.

Why does this feel so profound to me? The symbolism is so great... how brief and fleeting are the beautiful  moments of life! We need to take a minute to smell the proverbial roses when the opportunities arise.  How wonderful is the order (Seder) of the Universe, giving us comfort in the continuity of seasons and celebrations, and stability with which to face the unexpected.  How incomprehensible is the number of blooms on that one tree, and by extension... the people of the world, and the expanse of the Universe!  Puts your own life in perspective, doesn't it?

Who knew that a tree in someone else's yard  could make me wax so philosophical?  Well, you know, it's Pesach... for a little longer.

A Little More of a Good Thing

I started to put away all the beads from The Lamp, but they looked so pretty sitting there together, I decided to do one more project with them first. And remember I had that one piece that didn't fit on the lamp?  That was an excellent starting point.

So here it is, a free-form sculptural peyote bracelet. It doesn't have a name yet, but I'll come up with something. Meanwhile, it's good to know that if I ever need to have a matching lamp-and-bracelet ensemble, I'm good to go!

While I'm at it, I have to give a shout-out to Jeannette Cook, who taught me to go Free-form.  It has brought a whole new dimension to my work. Thanks, Teach!

Grab a Chair

Here's a partial view of the chair I decorated for this year's Chair Affair. It's called "Love Seat."  It's about 6 or 7 inches high, and very pink. Not my usual color playground, but everyone needs to get out sometimes, right?

There are about 100 pieces for sale at this year's auction, which raises a LOT of money for Portland's Community Warehouse.  Most are full-size chairs, but some are other furniture pieces, and some are paintings of chairs.  I'm not sure if mine is the only mini.

Five members of ORA have contributed pieces this year: Robin Esterkin, Laurie Fendel, myself, Gary Pearlman, and Eddy Shuldman. Cool, huh?

The auction takes place on April 8th... it's a gala auction dinner. Tickets are $50 per person, or $400 for a table of 10.  There will be a live auction for things like beach trips and cooking class, with the Chairs etc being sold by silent auction.  If you want to see the Chairs ahead of time, there is a preview reception on Thursday evening March 25th at the Galleria downtown.  Admission is free.  I'll be at both events, and hope to see you there!

The Chair Affair +   
Dinner & Auction
Date:   Thursday, April 8, 2010
Time:   5:30 - 9 pm
Location:  The Showroom at1625 NE Sandy, Portland 97232

Click here for information and to buy tickets.

Stone and Glass

At last, my beaded lamp can be revealed.  It seemed like i should wait till our "Light" exhibit opened at Elements Glass Gallery before I post the photo.  So now, it's time.  Everyone was really kind to come out and support us last night, and I got a lot of good feedback on the lamp, which was a great feeling!

I hope to have more photos soon, from different angles. But for now, here's a picture taken last night by Sharon Segal.  Thanks so much, Sharon!

The base is made of alabaster, which my darling husband drilled through to insert a light fixture holding a light bulb. The globe is a cool-looking crackly white-on-clear glass, glued to the stone base.  And the beadwork is free-form sculptural peyote, using many sizes of glass seed beads and crystals.  The beadwork is sewn to a cloth strip which is glued to the glass globe at the top. That is the only place where it's actually attached to the globe, but the rest of the work is stitched to fit pretty snugly. I call it "Dawn's Early Light."

Please let me know what you think.  If you feel you simply MUST own this lamp, it is for sale at Elements Gallery in NW Portland!

Baruch atah adonai, eloheinu melech ha'olam, shehechiyanu v'kihimanu, v'higiyanu lazman hazeh.

Humanity Redeemed

Yesterday and today were fairly lousy days.  Everywhere I turned, people were being mean, or stupid, or both. By this afternoon, I was starting to understand those old ladies who just want to live with 27 dogs.

But then came our big opening-night reception at the art gallery this evening.  It was beautiful.  And i couldn't believe how many people showed up!  It was wonderful to see people come out to support us. I got a little teary-eyed, and decided I don't really need 27 dogs.  Humanity redeemed itself, at least for one more day.

Crossing the Finish Line... Going Toward the Light!

Okay, boys and girls, the lamp is FINISHED!  And it's out of my hands, on its way to the gallery for our exhibit. Wow, I feel so strange with neither the lamp nor the chair hanging over my head!


This Thursday, ORA's  art exhibit opens at Elements Glass Gallery with a first-Thursday reception from 5:30 to 9 pm.  The theme of the exhibit is "LIGHT."  Please come and see the beautiful art works on display (including my lamp which you're sick of hearing about, but just dying to see) by our members and special guests.  There will be food, drink, music, and ART!!  Come celebrate with us.

Elements Glass Gallery
1979 NW Vaughn St.
Portland, OR 97209
503.228.0575

New Members are In!

I am so bleary-eyed!  It's been a long day in front of the screen, but I did it.... I made new web pages for our four new ORA members, and revised the "Artists" page that leads to each of us.  Exhausting!  But go take a look.... http://www.northwestjewishartists.org/artists.html

That grindstone i was talking about?  The Light project?  It will be a pleasure to get back to it, with no screen and no keyboard!  See you tonight at the Pre-JAM Slam!!!!  7 pm at MJCC.... fun and free!

Back to the Grindstone

The CHAIR is finished!  It's not as extensively beaded as I had originally planned, but it's definitely cute.  And cute is important, right?  Very pink-and-purple, with hearts and everything.  We were supposed to give it a clever name, so I called it "Love Seat."  Which is almost clever.

The Love Seat will be featured for sale in the Chair Affair auction on April 8th, which is a benefit for the Portland Community Warehouse.   For more info, and some amazing photos of last year's chairs, see their website:   http://communitywarehouse.org/chairaffair/

So now, it's back to the grindstone for me. The Light project.  Okay, you've guessed by now... it's a lamp. With beading all around the glass globe.  It's been frustrating, but after a few days away from it, I think I can see it more objectively now.  It's pretty nice, and everyone else seems to think it's done.  Of course, I know better.  It's NOT done, but it will be.  Now I have a few days to add to it, and then I'll glue it to the glass at the end.  Hmmm, but first I actually have to make some new web pages before Wednesday night.  Oh well, it was fun visiting the Grindstone.  Back in a few...

The Dark Before the Light

Despite my moaning, groaning, and general whining, the project-from-heck is coming along.  I got it into a presentable form to submit to the jury Tuesday night, accompanied by a note explaining that it isn't finished, but I would like their feedback.  Sort of like a note-from-mom-saying-that-the-dog-ate-my-homework.  Believe it or not, the jury accepted the project for the show!  There have been some very dark moments during this process, and may still be more to come, but I'm starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel (play on words, since the exhibit's theme is "Light."  Clever, huh?)

Notice how I'm not telling you what it is?  You'll have to come see it at the Exhibit (see info below).  So now i guess I have to finish it, right?  Ack!

But today I decided to take a break from all that light, and do some work on my Chair Affair project.  Again, I'm not sure it will be ready on time, since they moved up the deadline.  But I'll do what I can.  It's a worthy cause, and a fun event.  And the little dollhouse chair I bought to decorate is sooo cute! Plus, there's no yellow involved, which at this point is very appealing !

I hope a lot of people come to both of these events.  Sorry, no dogs allowed.


"Light" Exhibit, featuring 20 ORA artists & associates
March 4 -14, 2010
(First Thursday reception March 4th at 5:30 pm)
 Elements Gallery and Hot Shop
 1979 NW Vaughn St
  503.228.0575


The Chair Affair, a benefit auction for Portland Community Warehouse
Thursday, April 8, 2020
5:30 - 9:00 pm
The Bison Building
419 NE Tenth St.
503.206.5244  or  linda@communitywarehouse.org  for information

Flipping Out

We're getting down to the wire... jury date is Tuesday night... time to put this baby together!  My stomach hurts. I spent some stressful time this morning, figuring out how to piece together the pieces I've made, and where they'll sit on the glass globe. Well, guess what? They didn't all fit!  I actually had to leave one out, and also had to construct one more piece to fit into an empty spot.  Sigh...

But I came up with this cool piece, starting with a semi-circle I had already done (you can see it in the previous post), and adding the reverse flips to fill the space.  What do you call this shape?  It reminds me of that 1964 haircut... the "flip."  With a tiara.

So, back to the construction. Trying to fit them together is crazy, because I have to attach them temporarily to the globe. But how?  I tried 2-sided tape, then clamps.  Hmmm, I didn't try rubber bands.  But I ended up just scotch-taping each piece roughly into place.  It looks ridiculous. But slowly slowly, I'm getting the pieces sewn to each other. Once they're all attached, I can try my plan for anchoring them to the top of the glass, and I hope to have time to add some more embellishment.

I'm really regretting how the timing worked out, because it will not look like I envisioned it.  But at this point, I can only do what I can do, and hope it looks nice enough for the jury.  I'm trying not to flip out.

Balance

I've been working for several weeks in yellows, golds, white, with a touch of orange.  Gotta tell you, i am developing a very strong urge to do something in black and purple!!  Expect that to follow this project.  Don't know what it will be, but it will be DARK!!

After all, a person's got to have some balance in life.  You can't just eat carrots... you need chocolate too, right?  Right!

Shell Beads

Today a market research person asked me what I would do if stranded on a desert island.  I said that after seeking food and water, I would probably collect shells and make them into beads.  This, of course, is a little warped.  But I'm feeling pretty warped right now, working round-the-clock on a beading project, I have beads on the brain.

I'm working on this massive project for our "Light" exhibit at Elements Glass next month. The jury is in a week, and I don't know if the project will be ready in time.  Also, our ORA meeting is tonight, and I'm not sure I'll have enough of a structure to bother showing it to the group.  I'll have to make that decision later today, but over the weekend I finally made peace with myself about the jury next week.  I gave myself permission not to submit it.  If I'm not done in time, so be it.  I have a few other pieces to submit anyway, so that might be all there is.  I'm not going to be stressed about it anymore, because it is not constructive.  And now that I'm feeling more stoic about it, it's moving along faster, and will probably (I hope) be done in time.

I do, however, need to learn from this experience.  How did I get into this last-minute position? Again?  It's mostly that "can't say no" thing, which eats up a lot of my time.  I really have to pick my volunteer commitments more carefully.  And then there's the old time management thing, which is tied with losing weight and quitting smoking for the number-one most common vice that people strive every year to control.  At this age, am I ever really going to lose weight?  Or manage my time better?  It seems less and less likely each year, but I have to hang onto hope, no matter how dim it may be, and keep trying to improve.  Find little shells, search for a way to make them into beads.... keep trying....

The Nuisance of The Wild

I am an animal lover, and I love most of them.  But I don't like coyotes. I do not find them cute or beautiful or romantic or regal. They scare me for real.  Especially because I have a small dog, and coyotes have invaded our neighborhood big-time. 

Coyotes have been sighted on our own street for the last few weeks.  My son even had a near-collision with one on his way home to our driveway.  On Tuesday my husband was walking the dog and heard howling very nearby. Luckily our son happened to come by in the car, so Gary sent him ahead to look for the source of the howl.  Sure enough, it was a coyote, not 100 feet away.  Joel chased him away with the car, and went back to DRIVE Gary and the dog back home. Personally, I don't walk the dog on our street at all.  I drive him somewhere safer, and walk with him there.  This is crazy!

Yes, I understand this is all because their habitat is being destroyed. But this particular neighborhood was built almost 40 years ago, so why are they appearing here now?  Well, I've been puzzled about that, but last night I think I figured it out.  There are a lot of new homes being built fairly nearby.  Not so close that I consider them in our neighborhood, but it's happening in so many nearby areas that I think the coyotes end up wandering over here, where there are no bulldozers, and plenty of small dogs & cats.

So at the moment we live in a state of siege.  I don't know what can be done about it, or how long it will last, but we live in fear.

Angst Relieved

Okay, I got over it.  I decided to keep going a bit further before evaluating.  And if I need to add more white behind the yellows or more golds in front, duh, I can just add them afterward.  The beauty of free-form beading is you can add anything anywhere you want, right?  So, just go with the flow!

Also, I had some help from looking through Margie Deeb's latest book, The Beader's Color Palette.  Mostly it confirmed that I'm on the right track.  But also, it was comforting, and stimulating, and put me in a better mental state.  Pretty pictures and color palettes will do that!

Angst in Living Color

Okay, we've got the base figured out, and hubby has the light bulb & cord almost all set, and I've finalized my choice of the globe. I even made a little sampler of colors so I can see how they each look with the light shining through.  So now there are no more obstacles... time to bead! Right? Well, kind of.

I figured out the beads I want to start with, and I started. But before I got very far, I was beset with doubts.  Beset, I tell you!  Me! About the colors!   This almost never happens to me... if there's one thing I don't generally agonize about, it's the colors.  But here I am, having an existential crisis about the colors! 

I thought it would be mostly yellows and golds, with accents of orange and red, kind of like the sun. Seems pretty straightforward. But the more I think about it (which I probably shouldn't do), the more I think that it won't look right that way... the light shining from behind the beads looks very different from light shining ON them. So maybe there should be a base layer of whites, with yellow etc over that.  Most of my Yizkor candles have had a primarily white background, which has worked well.  And THEN, I start thinking, what would go with the alabaster base? More towards the gold/tan family? And then.....

Aaaarrrrrrghghghghhhhhh!!! I can't steady my mind.  Do other artists go through this a lot?  I'm not used to it.  Maybe it's just my recent flu,  playing head games with me. Or maybe it's that unfamiliar "jury" concept. But my mind is a quivering mess of uncertainty at this moment.  I think I need to set the whole thing aside until tomorrow. Perhaps things will become magically clear. Or white, or yellow, or gold, or.....

Light and Chocolate

I don't really like working on art with an assigned theme.  I find it stressful, especially because it usually implies a specific exhibit with a specific deadline.  And yet, something really good always comes from the challenge.  Right now, our ORA members are working with the self-inflicted theme of  "Light," which seemed a logical choice, since that's what our name means, and because the exhibit will be in a glass gallery.  But then I got to thinking I should do something with an actual light source shining through the beadwork.  Of course this leads to all sorts of challenges, and surprises too. Of course, in the end, it's going to be a gorgeous project, and I'll be really proud of it, but during the process I feel stressed and nervous.

I know that some people enjoy that nervous feeling, stepping out of the comfort zone.  But personally, it makes me want chocolate.  A lot of chocolate.  Hmmmmm... now THAT would be an interesting theme.....







Our exhibit "Light"  will be held at:
Elements Glass Studio/Gallery/School
1979 NW Vaughn St.
Portland, OR 97209
503.228.0575
 
It will open with a First-Thursday reception on March 4, 2010.  Music, food, wine, artists. The whole nine yards.  Yikes!  I hope there will be chocolate....

Mittens With Strings

When I was 5, my mom attached a long string to my mittens, and strung them through the sleeves of my snow coat to prevent my losing them. It was a little uncomfortable, but she had good reason, based on her experience with me losing EVERYTHING.  When i was 9, my grandmother bought me a beautiful Snow White wristwatch, and I lost it. I was mortified, but she kindly bought me another.  I LOST IT TOO.

As I got older, the trend was refined a little.  Losing things is mostly based on FORGETTING them somewhere.  I lost my treasured Staff Jacket when I forgot it in a lecture hall at UCLA.  I knew exactly where I left it, but it just wasn't there anymore when I realized it.  I forgot keys, drivers license, purse, books, you name it.  Now I knew where I left them, but still they weren't with ME.

(I only forgot to pick up my kids once.)

Now that menopause has reared its ugly and demented head, forgetting things has been raised to the level of an art.  Sort of.  The ugly, in-your-face kind of art.  They write funny plays about it, but in one's real life, it's not funny at all.  I forgot my purse twice in one night this past weekend, and therefore ended up driving to and from a friend's house three times in one evening.  Twice to the synagogue in the last 20 hours because I forgot something there.... you get the picture.

So I try to figure out how I can reduce the frequency of forgetting things.  One way is not to carry a purse.  I do that a lot, but then when i need to use one, I'm unaccustomed to it, and forget it everywhere.  I guess I could get those "clapper" keys.  But sometimes I wonder if I could just tie strings to everything I take anywhere, and attach them to my clothes or my fingers.  Paints a really attractive picture, doesn't it???

Sigh.  Aging isn't for the faint of heart.....

A Most Unusual Day

Today my Father-in-law became a Bar Mitzvah. It was a most unusual day.

Sam is 83 years old, and never had a proper Bar Mitzvah as a boy, so he elected to do it now.  Instead of handing the Torah down through the generations, today's ceremony started with handing the Torah UP, from the grandchildren, to the children, to the Bar Mitzvah.  When i heard the plan, it sounded a little corny, but when it actually took place, and my silver-haired husband handed the Torah over to his elderly father, I have to admit it brought tears to my eyes.

All of Sam's children and grandchildren were involved in the service in one way or another. And the members of this Los Angeles congregation did a wonderful job of planning the whole thing, bringing food, coordinating musicians, etc. Our friend from Portland even led folk-dancing, since he happened to be in L.A. at just the right time.

But there was one moment that just cracked me up, because it was so twilight-zone.  The after-meal "benching" was led by well-known radio celebrity Dennis Praeger, who is an active member of the congregation.  It was pretty interesting, because it was almost like a Las Vegas lounge act, with actual applause at the end!  Let me tell you, this guy never met a microphone he didn't like.  So then, I sent a text message to my brother to tell him Praeger was leading benching.  Let's see... can you picture this...  I'm sending a text message on my cell phone (on Shabbes) to say that Dennis Praeger is leading benching at the Bar Mitzvah of my 83-year-old Father-in-law.  What could be unusual about any of that???

Messiah Coming Soon?

Well, Michael's was very disappointing. Didn't really find anything I was looking for. Of course, that doesn't mean I left empty-handed, but you know.... now i still need to hit a proper art supply store.                                                                

But here's the big news.  As soon as i finished drawing the Owl for our class homework, I took a deep breath and..... I drew my dog!!!  This has been itching at the back of my mind for a few weeks.... that I could probably do it, somehow.  And once the teacher presented the Owl, I felt that I could probably do Nacho.  It wasn't easy, but I did it, and it actually looks like him!  So I'm pretty excited.  A mere two months ago I could never have considered drawing something real.  And now... well, maybe the Messiah is near !

 
    

Colorful Ancient Memories

Tomorrow I'm going to  Michael's for a few things, including some kind of watercolor paints for our class homework.  Tonight I was googling 'watercolor paints' and it brought back a memory that I haven't thought of in over 40 years!  When I was a small child, maybe 5 years old, my parents bought me this metal tin of watercolor paints, but it was a really big set, with a LOT of colors. I don't remember how many, but it seemed like a HUNDRED!  Each one was a small square of color, and eventually some of the colors got used up before others, which was frustrating.  But all in all, I really LOVED that paint set!  Can't remember anything I painted with it, but I have a distinct memory of the FEELING of it, the smell, and the excitement.  Man, I love colors!  Hmmmm.... I'm gonna have to exercise some self-control at the store tomorrow.  Then again, sometimes self-control is overrated!

Paintbox photo from Shutterstock.com

New Toys!

Who knew there were such cool toys?  Last week I missed our drawing class, so I missed out on the electric eraser, but this week we were introduced to a water-brush, and watercolor pencils!  These are very clever inventions, and way too much fun!  You can fill the water brush with water and then take it with you, along with your watercolor paints, and paint anywhere without making (much of) a mess.

And then there's the watercolor pencils, which seem like regular colored pencils, except they're water soluble, so when you run your nifty-spiffy water brush over the drawing, the color dissolves into watercolor paint.  I may be the only person in North America who didn't know about their existence, but it's news to me, and fun news at that!


The teacher also introduced us to the idea of  less-is-more with regard to watercolor paints. But anyone who knows me knows this is a tough sell. Still, I tried NOT to color in the entire picture.


We actually had a fun class tonight, because only a few people showed up, so it was more casual and intimate than usual, and I think this served the teacher well.  I drew a pretty good copy of a picture of a covered bridge.  It's not done yet, but I'll post it when I'm finished.  I got a great compliment when Gershon came home:  he looked at the drawing and said "wait, I thought you couldn't draw!"  Heh-heh...

Dust to Dust

I just had the sad responsibility of telling my Mom that Louise Hefter passed away.  Louise was one of "the moms" when we were growing up.  And she and Gerry were founding members of Israel Academy, loyal supporters of my Dad's, and true friends of our family.  The news was very hard for my Mom to hear, and hard for me as well.

Louise was such a special, wonderful person.  Always smiling, even in the craziest, nastiest times.  People always say that kind of thing about a person, how special they were. But Louise really was something else.  She always made people feel so comfortable and loved.  And everyone loved her.  It's hard to find the words to describe her old-fashioned supportiveness.

Funny what comes to mind at this moment.  When my father died, there was bedlam in our house, and among our large community of friends.  The funeral was huge, the crowd at the meal afterward was enormous.  But in the middle of it all, Louise took the time to make her famous eggplant parmesan just for us.  Now that I know how time-consuming it is to make, I really appreciate her dedication in the middle of all the craziness that week, to make us that dish simply because I asked for it. There might have been more important ways for her to allot her time at that moment, but maybe not.  I will remember that meal forever, the comfort of the food and the love that went into it.

Louise is the first of "the moms" to pass away.  Of course, several of the dads are gone, but this is a new hurt. It feels scary as well as sad. Time keeps moving, and we just have to use it as well as we can.

Baruch Dayan Ha'Emet.

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I'm a dot-com!

Okay, I finally did it.  I decided a long time ago to register my own domain name and pay for commercial hosting. But I never did it, mainly because I couldn't decide on the domain name.  With Yahoo closing down Geocities later this month, my existing website is going to disappear, so now the pressure was on.  This indecision's killin' me.... so I asked some friends their opinions:  EstherBeads  or CrownJewels?  Can you guess what the results of this little poll were?  You guessed it -- a tie!

What to do? What to do?  Did a little more research today, and found that the Crown Jewels thing is a little sticky, although I think I could have CrownJewels.net.  Made an executive decision to go with EstherBeads.com and I registered the domain name and ordered hosting service.  Yay!  So now I'm all grown-up, just like the big kids.  All I have to do now is get the website established, and then upload all those ridiculous pages.  I should start over from scratch, but I just don't have the time right now, and I want to have something there when people come home from the 10/25 show with my card in their hands.

Slowly, slowly, I'm getting there.  After the first of the year, I'm going to get serious about re-doing the pages, and getting shopping carts for myself and for the ORA site.  Dream big, little girl!

Respect the Flow

Okay, we have stopped procrastinating, and hired a contractor to work on the flooding problem. They are excavating along the front length of the house, and will seal the whole foundation with a series of super-duper high-tech materials to prevent future flooding.

But you have to also address the fundamental problem, and it's fascinating to see what previous attempts are revealed as the excavation goes deeper into the ground. (See how I'm making this sound like a positive experience?)  There was some kind of tar applied to the house, but either it wasn't very well done, or it just disintegrated over the years.  There is also a long French Drain, which is a good idea, but was incorrectly done. (See my earlier comment on incompetence.) There are holes in the foundation itself, apparently from bolts which rusted over the years.

You have to respect the flow.  The water is not going away. The rains will not stop. And the house will (we hope) continue to sit on the side of a hill.  So you have to plan for those things, and accomodate as well as you can.  We will replace the French Drain with a properly built one, possibly expanded to cover more area.  That seems to be the best way to spread the water around over a larger, deeper area. And the series of insulations they're applying should protect the foundation from the inevitable moisture.  And the trees which had to be removed will be replaced with more appropriate bushes, placed a little further away from the house.

The cost of respect?  Pretty much the same as the cost of disrespect: astronomical.  And rising each day.  Sigh....

(Painting:  "The Sound of Many Waters" by J.E. Millais)

Grapes and Mangos

I started my drawing class, and the teacher insists that everyone can actually draw. We'll see about that. First assignment was to copy this picture of grapes. Most people's grapes looked more like mangos to me, and some looked like bowling balls! I guess we're not quite there yet, but it was better than I expected.

Incompetence Everywhere

Can there really be that many incompetent fools in our world? How does the world continue to function? Sigh....


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Time Flies

Wow, strange year! I haven't written anything for my blog, mainly because I'm busy trying to keep the ORA blog current. I'm not cut out for two blogs. Oh well, no one reads this one anyway.

So let's see, what happened since my last entry on January 28?
Oh yeah: Facebook! This thing has been incredible! I'm up to around 200 "friends," including a wonderful number of old Solel friends. It's been so fun to catch up with people I haven't seen in 35 years! And new connections too... people you know vaguely become real "friends" when you read each other's musings on FB. I find it fascinating, and gratifying.

Also this year: L.A. in January, Safam concert at CNS, RACC computer class, the crazy shit surrounding Robby's Bar Mitzvah, Pesach at the Conroys' (dining with Duke), Maimouna, trip to Oakland (sick as a dog), all the heartache around CNS releasing Cantor Shivers, the farewell dinner and Robby-Solomon-Shabbat, Dana and Craig came to visit, Gus Hanawalt's Hawaiian wedding, Micah's UofO graduation, Sonia and I went up to visit Lucille, Lucille visited here, Jonah's Bar Mitzvah in Boston, Judith Berdichevsky passed away, Micah got a real job, Joel screwed up in schoool, Nacho's seizures, my continuing efforts with Mary Lou to find a suitable med, Marty Berger's Bar Mitzvah, our 35th anniversary trip to Vancouver and Seattle, Kim and Paris visited here last week, plus lots of Mah Jongg, many books read, and lots of ORA meetings.

Well! No wonder I haven't written... I've been kind of busy! Still, it's hard to believe that this calendar year is 3/4 finished, and we just concluded RH and Yom Kippur 5770!

And now our big ORA show is only 4 weeks away! Am I ready? Not even close! I was thinking of writing about the Bead Fest show this past weekend, but I think I should go do some beading instead.